Kylie Jenner versus Kaley Cuoco

Kaley Cuoco vs. Kylie Jenner (Results: Lookout! Words: Wiz)

BEFORE:

A couple of years ago, this would have been considered a mismatch, with Hall of Famer Cuoco battling a girl with a below .500 record. These days? The girl with the below .500 record is the favorite. And, it's not just that Kaley is showing signs of decline at 36 (and hasn't had a winning year since 2016). It's that Jenner has put it together and become quite the slugger the last two years, claiming plenty of impressive scalps. And the brunette is confident Kaley's will join that list. "Yeah, she was good...back when I was, like, in HIGH school. Well, it's 2021 now and there's a new sheriff in town. And, Kaley is about to get GUNNED DOWN."

"You know," says a hard-eyed Kaley. "There's only going to be ONE Hall of Famer in that ring tonight. And, SHE will be the one getting her hand raised."

ROUND ONE:

Or, maybe not. As, for some reason, the blonde thinks standing in front of Kylie and slugging with her is a good idea. Now, this isn't the Cuoco of ten years ago, a smallish light who relied on speed and athleticism. Kaley's stronger, thicker, heavier now. But, still. Why are you going to stand in front of Jenner when that's EXACTLY what Jenner wants? Yeah. It doesn't work. Instead, Kylie lands some hard shot that shakes Kaley early and gets her moving backward, and Jenner simply walks her down, keeping her backing and covering for the entire round. Cuoco tries again and again to hold canvas, but, every attempt is met with more hard shot from Jenner, who holds on to control right to the bell. When it rings, Cuoco's face is already looking puffy and Kylie has the round wide and the 10-9 lead.

ROUND TWO:

NOW we're seeing Kaley. Cuoco's using that athleticism, moving the feet, angling, bobbing the head, becoming hard to find. And, when the conditions are right, a quick pop forward for a solid combination, forcing Jenner to cover up and then circling away. It's like that the entire round. Vintage Kaley, the Kaley of the championships, the Kaley who earned her way into the Hall of Fame. And, there's not much Kylie can do about it. The brunette lands a solid right here and there, but it's all one-punch stuff. It's the blonde who's calling the tune, controlling the bout, and getting by far the best of things. Late in the round, Kaley backs Jenner up with a BIG combination that gets Kylie's knees a wobblin', but, before Cuoco can follow up, the bell rings, bringing down the curtain on a round that goes to Kaley wide to even things at 19.

ROUND THREE:

Cuoco testing Jenner early and finding Kylie's still buzzed. So, Kaley gets to work, walking forward now behind the left jab, sitting down on right hands, beating Jenner up and forcing her back again and again. Kylie keeping the guard high, firing back here and there, but she's taking a thumping and, for the second round in a row, there's not much the brunette can do about it. Instead, Kaley piles up the points and the hurt, getting Jenner's nose trickling blood and not forgetting to dig a little body while she's at it. Final thirty seconds sees the younger woman stabilizing her front and giving as good as she gets. Cuoco, with a veteran's clock sense, stops pressing. She's got the round and she knows it, so she jabs the remaining time away, claiming her second straight frame wide and taking a 29-28 lead.

ROUND FOUR:

Jenner aggressive, moving forward behind the jab, looking to force the action. Kaley not going to get into set piece firefights with the brunette. Instead, she's moving the feet, giving ground here and there, working the left hand, popping forward to get off offensively, but just as quickly slipping back to range. For Kylie's part, she's effective at times, getting in Kaley's grill and making with the heavy leather to both head and body. She never hurts the blonde, but she does offset what Cuoco's doing when she's got more space to move and groove. Result is a good, two-way round, the first one we've had in this stanza, and it's close from the opening seconds to the closing bell. When that bell rings, it's Kylie who's grabbed what could be an important point, taking it narrowly and evening things at 38.

ROUND FIVE:

More two-way action. Credit to Jenner for dialing back her normal "all guns blazing" aggression. She's fighting soundly, moving the feet and the head, keeping the gloves up. Brunette's committing on punches in spots, but not taking unnecessary chances with the blonde, having already felt the power Kaley can bring. For Cuoco's part, she's moving well, showing off her superb conditioning, getting that left in Jenner's face a LOT and scoring off it in combination in spots. Once again, there's not a lot in it as both blonde and brunette have their moments, while neither is able to establish any sort of control. Thus, for the second round in a row, things are in doubt right to the bell. But, this time, when the final seconds tick away, it's Kaley who's done just a bit more and pulls back into the lead 48-47.

ROUND SIX:

More of the same. Kylie pressuring soundly. Kaley looking to enforce space with her left hand, boxing, moving, bouncing forward for a quick flurry when she finds an opening. And, once again, we see two solid minutes of very even stuff with absolutely nothing in it...BOOM! Jenner a right hand and CUOCO IS HURT! Kylie times a perfect right off her jab and Kaley is rumblin', stumblin', fumblin'....and GOING DOWN AFTER A BRUTAL RIGHT HOOK! Cuoco crashing to her right side after an absolute BOMB from Kylie. Jenner saunters back to a neutral corner, confident this thing is over. Maybe too confident. Kaley pushing up to elbows and knees at six, but then falls back to her right side at seven! It's OVER. The count passes the Hall of Famer by and it's OVER! And your winner by KO6 is Kylie Jenner!

AFTER:

Kylie's scuffed in a major way post-fight, but, she simply shrugs and says, "I TOLD you there was a new sheriff in town. All these lightweights...none of them can handle MY power. Just ask Kaley. When her head clears. Sometime tomorrow, probably."