Post by HBO's Boxing At The Asylum on May 31, 2021 16:29:57 GMT -6
O'Dell: "You are looking LIVE at the sold out Asylum Arena in Philadelphia! I'm Jennifer O'Dell, and I'm here along with Tess Valmore, The Bad Girl Of The FCBA, Cassie Scerbo, and The Loose Cannon Of The FCBA, The Straw That Stirs The Drink, Jenny McCarthy, and ladies, we're going to wrap May with another great Asylum card!"
McCarthy: "And, we'll be starting in the division where I rule, bantamweight..."
Cassie: "I'm retired, so you won't be punished for that...probably..."
McCarthy: "Don't you THREATEN me..."
O'Dell: "Let's get to the FIGHT, Mac..."
McCarthy: "We're going to be subjected to the Asylum return of Bebe Rexha, who is not fit to carry my spit bucket, against Sophie Mudd, who wouldn't last three rounds with me!"
Tess: "Next up...well, we don't KNOW what's going to happen. Well, ONE of us does..."
Cassie: "That's right, ONE of us does. Because Front Street's newest addition will be in action in the second bout of the night against a mystery opponent. Then, we'll move to flyweight, the division where I FORMERLY ruled, for the Asylum return of JoJo against Billie Eilish!"
Tess: "We'll stay at flyweight next and witness Ariana Grande's return to Philly to battle Meg Donnelly!"
Cassie: "Then, it's back to bantamweight, as Charli XCX returns to the Asylum against Kat Dennings!"
McCarthy: "And, then, we'll FINALLY see a REAL fighter, because we'll be back to flyweight where former Unified Flyweight Champion Anna Kendrick returns to Asylum to square off with Weirdo's one REAL fighter, former Unified Flyweight Champion Kristen Stewart!"
O'Dell: "Six fights, at least two weight classes and one heck of a card. So get those shot glasses and bingo cards ready, sit back, relax, and enjoy 'A Musical Night At The Asylum III: Season of the Witch'!"