Lucy Pinder versus Kelly Kelly

Lucy Pinder vs Barbara Jean Blank ("Kelly Kelly")
(This Is Glamour vs Hot & Dangerous)
(2-12, 2 KO vs 0-1)
Results: Lookout!; Story: Vassago

BEFORE: British Page Three legend Lucy Pinder returns to FCBA competition upon fan request for the first time since June 2016 when she pushed the current JMD champion Kylie Jenner into a ten round jug muggin' slugfest. She owns a woeful overall record but has actually won one of these fights before unlike WWE star name Barbara Jean Blank aka Kelly Kelly whose career just can't take off in this league for whatever reason. Booking a debut JMD clash versus Emily Ratajkowski seemed perfect to turn some heads even in defeat but reality bites the Florida native hard. Not even the annual Boxermania events bothered to sign the shapely blonde into some undercard action over the years! Tigress Uppercut Magazine quips that Blank is even more ignored than her hometown Jaguars in the NFL but with the saviour from Clemson ready to hit town (Hi, Trevor) maybe Duval county is about to break through in style this year after all?

Lucy Pinder wears a black bikini set with red trim & red gloves. Long dark brown hair tied in a high ponytail. Kelly Kelly wears a black one-piece swimsuit with multiple vertical cutouts & silver gloves. Long blonde hair tied in a half-up ponytail. The fight is scheduled for ten rounds in the bantamweight division.

Round 1:
Lucy shows plenty of courage just pounding away in fury and it seems like Kelly doesn't believe the British glamour model can punish her until she gets caught with a drilling right hand on the jaw and slumps to her heels which allows the brunette to add more leather straight on target! Kelly finds the pace too hot for comfort when she leaks more thumping menace and Pinder simply backs her onto the ropes where she dissects the blonde's tummy in hard-pounding fashion! Uh-oh! Maybe that's why Boxermania doors are closed for the Florida native? She allows Lucy to pummel her into a standstill before a looping cross finds the temple and has the blonde slumping into loud spasms at the bell - totally against the odds!

Round 2:
Kelly vows to outwork the audacious Brit in a heads-up slugging exchange but she somehow prefers not to punish Lucy's most obvious target along the way which leads into a steady back & forth exchange that doesn't really tip the scales during a hectic opening minute. Both women show plenty of desire to dish out the hits but they lack poise and execution before a clash of heads truly stalls the action. Kelly muscles her way on top of the brunette along the ropes though and whacks her up the chimney just past the two-minute mark and keeps landing more single shots over the top to keep Pinder trapped in the corner for remainder of the round.

Round 3:
Kelly scampers across the canvas to resume the quick jabbing pounce but she bounces off the top of Lucy's forehead down the stretch and wobbles into a nasty hook on the jaw that sinks her into quiet spasms while the British glamour model drills her on the toned abs just to find her mojo again. She rips more of that flesh and cripples Kelly into a clinching ideas that simply shock most of the fans as the Florida native keeps leaking way too many punches here and allows the otherwise lacklustre tourist to beat her up in classic slugging fashion. Ugh! Kelly gets smacked on the lips just as Lucy decides to switch her targets and she makes Kelly look awfully hittable here until another clinch halts the action for good.

Round 4:
Kelly's head is all over town as she sends in a chaotic jabbing rush that Lucy withstands with ease before dropping another bomb on the jaw. Ugh! Kelly stumbles to the side but Pinder misses on the pounce and gets caught by a seemingly wayward shot on the jugs that finally allows the blonde to punish the most obvious target all along. She goes down the jug muggin' route as if she can do anything else to shut the Brit down and allthough Pinder has soaked up all the chest barrage over the years, she still gets clobbered onto the ropes where Kelly's chaotic attacks pin her behind a tight defense. Lucy plucks a single-hand response but struggles to steal the round outright as Kelly nails her with a thumping left/right cross in the dying seconds and adds another belting harpoon right on the bell as well.

Round 5:
Lucy tries to slug it back up the middle but Kelly beats her for an overhand swing and shatters her lips during a hectic exchange in the opening minute. Lucy believes she can hurt the blonde to the body again but gets her boobs shoved into her chin before the WWE diva cranks up the jabbing volume and blows into the brunette's face with additional force. Uh-oh! Lucy suddenly looks vulnerable as Kelly nails her from both flanks; she tears a small gash under the left eye before drilling the temple and slumping Pinder onto jelly knees. Ugh! Lucy tries to swing it one more time but eats a vicious hook on the nose AND DROPS ONTO HER BACKSIDE with a loud thump moments later!!! "Stay down, tramp!!!", Kelly shouts at the fallen opponent and she's fortunate enough Lucy's punching resistance is as suspect as they come!!! The buxom brunette keeps blinking in apparent state of shock before she tries to get up but wobbles onto her backside at eight again and just can't stay off the boards before sliding onto her back for keeps. KO5 Kelly Kelly in unconvincing fashion!!!

AFTER: Kelly parades around the ring like she's the Diva champion again but she had to work hard for this success and that's not exactly a good thing when your opponent remains winless in FCBA since January 2016! The Hot & Dangerous entourage looks relieved Kelly has finally managed to get off the mark but she requires more regular work to sustain a career in celebrity female boxing. Even BLONDE! Magazine claims there's nothing to write home about here but those Kelly Kelly fans on social media truly have a different opinion.

Meanwhile Lucy seems happy she simply got another shot on the American market and claims she can still sell seats regardless what the naysayers think. Given how hittable she is, maybe it's a surprise she didn't get a call for the upcoming British Invasion at the Asylum but there's every chance her compatriots won't exactly steal the headlines over in Philadelphia either.

Official Result: Kelly Kelly def. Lucy Pinder KO5.