Meghan Markle vs Rose Byrne

Meghan Markle vs Rose Byrne
(FCBA Independent vs Foxfire Atlantic Boxing)
(10-9, 9 KO vs 1-5, 1 KO)
Results: Lookout!; Story: Vassago

{{ The timing of this bout awkwardly but maybe (un)intentionally mirrors Meghan & Harry's Tour of Australia dates which tells us it's taking place somewhere Down Under with high-security VIP attendance. We have no idea how FCBA managed to provide a stream coverage or how much did it actually cost! }}

BEFORE: Meghan Markle missed a golden opportunity to secure an elite scalp when she was stopped by Minka Kelly last month and now Foxfire Atlantic's Rose Byrne intends to steal the headlines by knocking her lights out plain and simple! Joining the House of Windsor has elevated Meghan's profile like no win on her FCBA resume but some pundits don't believe the L.A. native has genuine staying power to become a serious contender. She might hover around the .500 mark for the remainder of her career but at least she doesn't have to worry about free publicity anymore!

Meghan Markle wears a red sports bra, black hotpants and white gloves. Long dark brown hair tied in a curled ponytail. Rose Byrne wears a light blue one-piece swimsuit with white trim and black gloves. Long dark brown hair tied in a braid. The fight is scheduled for ten rounds in the bantamweight division.

Round 1:
Meghan carries plenty of ahem... royal confidence into this bout and stacks Rose up with a head-hunting assault that imediately drives the Aussie brunette onto her heels. She tries to respond over the top but lacks the effort to match Meghan's intensity and gets dropped onto the ropes with more crisp punches punishing her guard. Markle keeps working on the sluggish foe from point-blank range but then gets clinched as she tries to smack Byrne to the body; the Aussie looks a little desperate here already but avoids a wholesale beating as she drags Meghan into a wrestling struggle the referee has a hard time stopping.

Rounds 2 & 3:
Meghan simply runs this bout from the front and renders Rose into mere counter-punching response that fails to throw the younger brunette off her stance. In fact, it does the opposite as those single punches draw a cheeky smile from Markle who racks up superior numbers and keeps punishing Byrne up the middle. It's not a genuine classic by any means but even Sarah Cumming in the booth realizes that Meghan doesn't have to perform at 100% to still dictate the pace and keep Rose under wraps. The Aussie footwork becomes her main weapon down the stretch but one's not going to win the judges' approval by being mobile alone. Meanwhile Meghan doesn't rush her attacks and prefers to ride out the impression Rose is simply scared to fight her at even terms. She laughs out loud at the conclusion of the third round and even Foxfire Atlantic head trainer Sophia Myles realizes there's something fundamentally wrong with their approach here.

Round 4:
Rose jumps into a sudden attack and catches the royal brunette by surprise. Meghan's jaw soaks up a nasty uppercut that drops her onto immediate jelly knees and there's more coming from the hitherto sleepwalking brunette. Maybe that was the plan all along? To lure Meghan into a false sense of security? She struggles to keep up with Byrne's high-octane blast and disappears butt-in-ropes down the stretch with the Aussie blowing past her guard to connect with the chest once she abandons the head-hunting ordeal. Rose barks in her repeated efforts to knock Meghan down but doesn't carry enough power supply to make it happen in one sustained try and gets clinched late with Markle yelping in discomort but still fending off the wolves... or more like a pack of dingos given Rose's nationality?

Round 5:
There's no way back for Rose as she leaps into another steady assault and Meghan's the one playing spooked now as she dances around the older brunette's head-hunting drill. She enforces the mid-range exchange where Byrne just can't quite lay it all out though and always arrives a mili-second late with her swings. That's maybe enough to win the judges approval but doesn't really punish the royal brunette who begins to display that cheeky smile again as Rose's huffin' & puffin' fail to cash in with the real prize. Byrne becomes too heroic for her own good and she tries to blitz the American late only to eat a proper cross hook on the nose instead. "You're so pathetic!", Meghan dismisses her rival's attempts to look competent here and strangely enough the local audience doesn't really support Byrne all that much. All frickin' Commonwealth fans here or what?

Round 6:
Rose tries to close Meghan down again but gets beaten for a quick overhand and suddenly the L.A. native rips a left cross on the jaw that makes the Aussie brunette really feel it... uh-oh... Rose goes fish-tailing upon another impact with the jaw before Markle flies in with a gut shot that almost ticks off the Gena Lee Nolin box... but not quite... eithe way, Byrne folds forward and meets another crushing uppercut on the jaw THAT SENDS HER CRASHING DOWN ONTO HER BACK... Huh! How about that? That's what you call a ROYAL finish... Byrne only sits up at six and realizes there's something wrong with her jaw so simply shakes her head and the ref waves it off! KO6 Meghan Markle!!!

AFTER: More smiles and laughs from Meghan who's quickly ushered away by the security crew though as the House of Windsor won't tolerate any post-fight humiliation either given or taken on a royal trip overseas. That won't stick even on Commonwealth territory. Sarah Cumming and the Seven Network crew are also batted down so they have to settle with the interview with your loser next: "Argh... #@#@#!!#.. My jaw hurts!!!"

And there she goes... a furious Rose Byrne storms out of the arena leaving Sarah Cumming completey gobsmacked. Maybe Archer News Service will provide a medical update on Rose's status as it appears her pride has suffered the biggest blow tonight.

Official result: Meghan Markle def. Rose Byrne KO6.