Post by Tractorpull on Jul 10, 2018 9:10:28 GMT -6
TESS VALMORE
F. JONES/FOY This is not Foy’s debut. She has previously fought Ariel Winter at the Asylum, a fight that she lost. Jones has had five fights winning two. Foy is a slightly younger and slightly bigger. Now for the record both are from the UK, however, Jones is from Birmingham. We have one of those in the US. I will make her an imaginary citizen. Even with her record slightly below water, I have to believe Jones will win.
DELEVINGNE/BOWDEN OK, I am from Tennessee. Like the old cliche, “American by birth, Tennessean by the grace of God.” We, down here are patriotic. Surely, somebody better than Bowden could be found to face Delevingne. Bowden has lost seven out of eight and her last four, Her last win was in 2014 and she hasn’t had a fight in almost two years. I grant you Delevingne is not the best fighter to come out of the UK, but if Bowden had been defending New Orleans in 1815, we would be doing tea and crumpets on Jackson Square in the afternoon rather than swilling Sazeracs. Delevingne by a KO
KNIGHTLEY/SEYDOUX Knightly is from the UK, Seydoux is French. How does this fit into the fight scheme? Well, I guess British are still peeved at the French for helping us. Knightly isn’t all that active having had eight FCBA fights in seven years. She broke a six fight losing streak earlier this year. Seydoux has been more active in both the BBU and the FCBA and has winning records in both, with being far more successful the BBU. I have to go with Seydoux to win
ALBA/EVE Here we have the co-main event. The US is represented by a 37 year old bantam who has lost her last nine in a row with her last win being in 2014 Her last loss was to Beckinsale who happens to be from.…wait...drum roll…the UK. Ah yes, America at its best. Alba is facing Alice Eve. I have to use Eve’s full name in order to avoid any confusion with another female who had the same name although somewhat older. Eve has lost six of eight FCBA bouts and her last three. My patriotism overwhelms my sanity. Alba will win
BECKINSALE/MARKLE How did this bout get passed the Royals. I got to tell you the Duchess of Suffolk will be in deep do do when the Queen finds out. Markle, actually has a winning record in the FCBA and has won her last three. One of here wins was over Eve. Take that you kidney pie eaters. Beckinsale has been somewhat inactive in the last two years. She is on my list of best fighters never to hold a title. She has wins over at least three Hall Of Fame members. I doubt that there is any mystery as to how this bout is going to go. The big question is how are they going to get Markle back through customs to join her prince without alerting the Royals
F. JONES/FOY This is not Foy’s debut. She has previously fought Ariel Winter at the Asylum, a fight that she lost. Jones has had five fights winning two. Foy is a slightly younger and slightly bigger. Now for the record both are from the UK, however, Jones is from Birmingham. We have one of those in the US. I will make her an imaginary citizen. Even with her record slightly below water, I have to believe Jones will win.
DELEVINGNE/BOWDEN OK, I am from Tennessee. Like the old cliche, “American by birth, Tennessean by the grace of God.” We, down here are patriotic. Surely, somebody better than Bowden could be found to face Delevingne. Bowden has lost seven out of eight and her last four, Her last win was in 2014 and she hasn’t had a fight in almost two years. I grant you Delevingne is not the best fighter to come out of the UK, but if Bowden had been defending New Orleans in 1815, we would be doing tea and crumpets on Jackson Square in the afternoon rather than swilling Sazeracs. Delevingne by a KO
KNIGHTLEY/SEYDOUX Knightly is from the UK, Seydoux is French. How does this fit into the fight scheme? Well, I guess British are still peeved at the French for helping us. Knightly isn’t all that active having had eight FCBA fights in seven years. She broke a six fight losing streak earlier this year. Seydoux has been more active in both the BBU and the FCBA and has winning records in both, with being far more successful the BBU. I have to go with Seydoux to win
ALBA/EVE Here we have the co-main event. The US is represented by a 37 year old bantam who has lost her last nine in a row with her last win being in 2014 Her last loss was to Beckinsale who happens to be from.…wait...drum roll…the UK. Ah yes, America at its best. Alba is facing Alice Eve. I have to use Eve’s full name in order to avoid any confusion with another female who had the same name although somewhat older. Eve has lost six of eight FCBA bouts and her last three. My patriotism overwhelms my sanity. Alba will win
BECKINSALE/MARKLE How did this bout get passed the Royals. I got to tell you the Duchess of Suffolk will be in deep do do when the Queen finds out. Markle, actually has a winning record in the FCBA and has won her last three. One of here wins was over Eve. Take that you kidney pie eaters. Beckinsale has been somewhat inactive in the last two years. She is on my list of best fighters never to hold a title. She has wins over at least three Hall Of Fame members. I doubt that there is any mystery as to how this bout is going to go. The big question is how are they going to get Markle back through customs to join her prince without alerting the Royals