Post by countrymouse on Feb 1, 2024 23:25:03 GMT -6
Ladies and gentlemen, gather 'round as we welcome a true legend to the arena tonight! She's not just a model; she's a sensation. In the late '90s and early 2000s, she graced six billboards in Times Square simultaneously. Can you believe it? Well, you better believe it!
That's right, folks! She's none other than the iconic Niki Taylor, and she's here to take us on a journey back to those unforgettable days. And guess what? She's not just here for a stroll down memory lane.
Indeed! Niki Taylor is stepping into the ring tonight, and she's wearing that legendary gold bikini we all remember from her Sports Illustrated spread. Thank you, god indeed!
The legendary solo from Guns N' Roses' 'November Rain' fills the arena, you can feel the anticipation building.
And here she comes, a true icon in her own right, Stephanie Seymour! Did you know that the song 'November Rain' was written for her? That's right, she's the muse behind one of the greatest rock ballads of all time!
Stephanie Seymour walks to the ring wearing Victoria's Secret's finest, and I have to admit, I used to think she WAS Victoria. She's the embodiment of beauty and style, and tonight, she's here to take on the challenge.
Round 1
Pauley Shore: Hey, buuuuuuudddies! It's the Weasel here, you had better hit that record button 'cause we've got one helluva showdown for ya! It's a smoking hot blonde duking it out with a bodacious brunette! I'm talkin' Niki Taylor, the hottest bikini girl in the world versus that chick you drool over in the Victoria's Secret catalog who nobody knows her name!
Down Town Julie Brown: Her name is Stephanie Seymour, and she’s not taking any prisoners tonight, folks! After that disastrous bout with Teri Hatcher, she's got something to prove, and she's coming out swinging. Remember when the Lois and Clark star handed her that solid beating, and Stephanie threw in the towel?
Pauley; Every night! Yeah buuuuddy!
Julie Brown: Well, well, well, folks, Stephanie's like, 'No more messin' around,' and she's diving headfirst into the action, totally cutting off Niki's defense! It's all happening right here, right now!
Pauley: Jab! The punches coming fast and fierce, bro! The leather glove struck Niki's face, rattling her teeth, dude! Oh, man, this is like, intense, I can't believe it!
Pauley: Left! Oh, man, bursts of light seemed to dance before her eyes! The leather against her cheek felt like a series of sharp, biting jabs, dude! Ouch, I can practically feel that!
Julie Brown: Are you alright there Dude?
Pauley: Right! Oh, man, Niki must be panicking! Her pulse is racing in her temple, and adrenaline kicking in. Even though Niki can see Stephanie's punch coming, she just can't will her legs to steer away, dude! I thought they were gonna wear sexy outfits and wrestle, but these chicks are really throwing down.
Pauley; The left hook connects with Niki's cheek, causing a sharp stinging sensation, dude! Her first thought is to defend, but the quick succession of blows leaves her with little time to react. She's on the verge of hitting the mat!
Round 2:
Julie Brown: Moving on to the second round, Niki Taylor's speed becomes a key factor in her performance. She demonstrates quick footwork and swift jabs, allowing her to control the tempo of the match.
Pauley Shore: Oh! Niki got her right in the nose! That's not a pretty face to make, man! I just wanted to see cute girls rip each other's clothes off, man!
Round 3:
Pauley Shore: It's only round 3, but Stephanie looks like she ran a marathon! Chest heaving, hair messed up. Whoah! They're dumping water over Stephanie's head! That's hot! Or 'cool,' whatever, Stephanie's hair is all slicked back, and she's all soaking wet now like when Daryl Hannah played that fish! This is getting better!
Down Town Julie Brown: In terms of endurance, Niki Taylor is barely sweating. She maintains her boxing style and tactics throughout the early rounds of the fight, showcasing her ability to control the match.
Round 4:
Down Town Julie Brown: Niki Taylor's skills in the ring are commendable, especially in her effective use of the jab to control the distance between her and Stephanie Seymour.
Pauley Shore: Oh! Poor Stephanie keeps eating punches right to the face! Oh, the humanity!
Down Town Julie Brown: Niki’s showing off her ring prowess by circling away from Seymour's attacks and countering with her own punches!
Round 5:
Pauley Shore: Stephanie is exhausted. Barely keeping her feet under her as Niki peppers that million-dollar face with jabs. Niki is playing with her like a cat.
Down Town Julie Brown: "However, despite her skills and endurance, Stephanie Seymour suddenly comes back to life landing a hook on Niki’s jaw that seems to ring her bell.
Pauley Shore: "Oh no! Niki eats a hard right! She’s stumbling back and POW! Niki catches a hard left-right combo. Niki hits the ropes and bounces back and Oh! A huge uppercut flings Niki back into the ropes and she slides down to the mat.
Down Town Julie Brown: Taylor is down folks! Taylor is down! The referee counts it down, but Taylor isn’t moving. Stephanie Seymour has beaten Niki Taylor in a huge upset.
Pauley Shore: I will tell you, I am hugely upset! Yeah, Buuuddy!