Alexandra Daddario versus Kelly Rohrbach (Baywatch Battle) May 26, 2017 18:27:15 GMT -6
Post by Lookout! Boxing on May 26, 2017 18:27:15 GMT -6
("Baywatch: The Movie" Premiere Fight)
Venue: Staples Center
Location: Los Angeles, California
Alexandra Daddario ("Summer Quinn") vs Kelly Rohrbach ("C.J. Parker")
Foxfire Boxing vs VIXENs
Results: Lookout!; Story: Vassago
BEFORE: If this fight occured in 1997, Nicole Eggert and Pamela Anderson would be starring as members of the original cast. Fast forward twenty years and we're dealt a classic blonde vs brunette rivalry that would sell out any single boxing card aroud the world - even without the iconic red swimsuits. But these very swimsuits make this new generation clash something a little more extra and not your everyday PPV field-filler. Not on the movie premiere day of all things!
It's almost unfair to bet against these two ladies under the circumstances, Alexandra has won FCBA silverware under Foxfire Boxing guidance and Kelly has done likewise while proudly representing the fast-improving VIXENs. The Sports Illustrated beach bunny vows to make Brooklyn Decker an afterthought in Southern California by defeating the brunette foe due to rumours linking the former Front Street model with the Caspian-owned stable. Of course it doesn't get any better than to claim the iconic Baywatch brand bragging rights tonight and the ensemble VIP presence further supports the high-stakes of this duell. Anderson, Eggert, Bingham, Eleniak and Packard are all here to witness the Baywatch reloaded and even the still active Gena Lee Nolin simply couldn't reject an opportunity to meet some of her old pals. The most prominent name missing is Yasmine Bleeth - apparently saddled with another drug rehab programme that has derailed her career faster than Johnny Football's worst nightmare.
Both women wear the iconic red lifeguard swimsuits - Alex the modern two-piece version with zipper (pictured) to indicate we're in 2017 and not 1997 anymore. Alex with dark brown hair straight and Kelly with long blonde locks in loose waves. Red gloves for Alex, white for Kelly. The fight is scheduled for ten rounds in the lightweight division.
A trail-blazer of a start allows Alex to catch the blonde with a riffle hook on the ear followed by a crushing uppercut on the jaw that sinks the other girl on jelly knees seconds into the fight! Ugh! Talk about making a statement here as Alex lands another left/right combo on the lips that simply shoves the shocked Kelly back and ignites a massive roar from the blood-thirsty crowd. Nobody expected the blonde bunny to struggle so badly so early but Daddario WHACKS her on the nasal ridge for a good measure shortly afterwards and before Rohrbach finds the ropes for support - SHE GOES DOWN ON HER BACKSIDE!!! Just like that Alex hits it out of the beach and stuns the odds which never saw a knockdown this fast happening! Kelly's more surprised than physically hurt, she sits down on her heels for a while before getting back up at seven and meets the brunette's ruthless look very quickly: "How about that? I guess we've set the tone for this one?" "Not in your wildest dreams!", she responds but finds it exceptionally tough to match the work rate thereafter and gets clobbered back to the ropes where Alex simply dominates and punishes the blonde to the body which allows her to run away with a monster performance and leave the Staples Center more or less speechless at the bell.
Round 2 & 3:
Give credit to Kelly's management pep talk which prevents a short fuse comeback effort that could have backfired sooner rather than later given Daddario's massive confidence boost following that knockdown. The blonde is forced to embrace the counter-punching slugfest as she was exposed badly and for the first time in her career looks as vulnerable as the second coming of Carrie Prejean. Alexandra rallies in each round to steal the highlights but lacks the knockdown haymayer to dent any hopes for the South Cal fanbase - even if Kelly hails from Connecticut of all places. Two east coast chicks duke it out in L.A. but VIXENs head-quarters are based just down the highway so Rohrbach is the designated home performer. She does well enough to draw the second but gets cracked upstairs in the third again as Daddario's intensity topples the blonde's resilience and pummels her butt-in-ropes while landing crisp body shots that make Kelly gasp for air at the bell.
Alexandra's zipper needs a little repair before the fourth as it keeps jamming at a strategic spot but this contest won't go topless unless Kelly channels the inner JMD spirits anytime soon. Still, she finally beats the brunette for the initial tangle and slams a left hook on the nose that drops Alex back and allows the blonde to punish her further with ultra precise jabbing straight up the middle. And she finds the rack after all which requires Alex to bide her time and adjust her targets - not fast enough for Kelly not to do something with it. A cracking uppercut blasts her on the nose again and a drilling left harpoon pierces the liver area. Daddario yelps out in pain and clinches the swimsuit model but Rohrbach just shoves her into the ropes and keeps plucking away at the exposed midriff which leaves the Foxfire lass in severe discomfort come the bell.
The Rohrbach comeback continues as Alex soaks up another early jabbing assault aimed at her boobs and the zipper slides half way down come the one minute mark - the blonde's ferocious striking subdues the iconic wardrobe as much as Daddario's mental edge and wraps the brunette into a massive chest-busting galore during the middle portion of the round. Ugh! Kelly wants to render Alex topless, that wicked girl really wants to do it and Daddario only screams out in horror when she slumps onto her bouncing rack and never catches a glimpse of a left hook that nails her on the ear AND SENDS TUMBLING DOWN IN THE CORNER just past the two minute mark. It's not over until it's over and Kelly has pulled right back into the mix as the crowd chants her name! Hell, Pam Anderson is as animated as anyone around Staples Center and gives Nicole Eggert a really long look across the seat. Meanwhile Alex looks a little more under the cosh than Kelly was in round one, she gets up at eight but looks a little hollow in the eye and needs to be asked twice if she's good to go. She is but Rohrbach's all over there during the final run and picks her off from close range to freeze the hitherto leader on the ropes and just add more punishment upstairs. Daddario's gloves slide down by her breasts and she develops a nasty swelling around the left eye come the bell. She's marginally ahead on points at half-distance but the blonde has the momentum going and could go all the way here!
Alex is shutdown mode after the knockdown, she blatantly avoids getting involved in classic punchfest and drags Kelly into a lenghty wrestling display which wins her no friends around the area. Kelly keeps her composure for a while but still lands nasty punches to the body while soaking up a half-hearted response down the stretch. The blonde eventually wins the shoving struggle and finds separation as she nearly trips the brunette to the groud before firing a left hook on the nose that traps Alex in the corner and paves the way for a late body-busting assault. Daddario leans over the ropes when the bell halts the SI model's charge and the writing is truly on the wall for the Foxfire veteran who needs more than a mere one minute break to pull her act together according to several pundits.
Kelly reigns supreme with another feisty close range tangle that sends the hapless brunette on her heels upon impact. Rohrbach drops the ideas of rendering her foe topless because she can slice the high guard into oblivion now and takes extra pleasure from adding wounds to that pretty Alex's face. Ugh! The brunette sends aerials all over shop and only grazes the charging blonde which soon sends her into defensive circles but Rohrbach's faster execution covers that with room to spare. Left.. right and another left.... double up on the inside and Daddario groans into a standstill in the corner as the blonde cranks it up and opens a nasty cut below the right eye to completely shut the other girl down.. Shake it and smoke it like it's 1997 again but Alex only leans back against the ropes and has nothing to give when Kelly swivels her head back & forth at the bell - basically that warrants a stoppage but no Baywatch bunny quits on her stool tonight!
It's all over bar the shouting and Beth Harnois will have a massive headache in the press office tomorrow since Alex is literally unresponsive when Kelly blasts through her high guard seconds into the eight and rocks the dark ponytail around and around... and around! Lord have mercy, even Pam Anderson has stopped laughing as she witnesses a true demolition of a very proud vixen... by a certified vixen no less! All hail the new Queen of Baywatch as Rohrbach batters Daddario into a training dummy mode and pounds her into the turnbuckle where she scythes across the swollen face one last time to shut the brunette's eyes cold... "LIGHTS OUT, BYTCH!!!", she screams out and removes the last ounce of consciousness from Alexandra's brain... a left hook shatters the nostrils AND DROPS DADDARIO'S DUMMY AT THE VICTORIOUS BLONDE'S FEET!!! Epic KO8 Kelly Rohrbach!!!
AFTER: A collective round of applause from the entire former Baywatch cast marks the crowning of the new queen and well, Kelly deserves that honor like nobody else after sending one of the most dangerous lightweights into Sleeping Beauty mode. Pamela Anderson wants to hand over the official trophy - yes, it's that inflatable rescue buoy marked with special FCBA numbers - only to discover that Gena Lee Nolin - who else - has taken sole possession of it and issues a straight-forward challenge to Kelly upon handing it over: "OK, here's the deal, kid! You won! Great! You're the new Baywatch Bunny Supreme! Even better! Sort of... But I'm the Original Baywatch Queen Blonde and that's for me to stay and you to learn to admire. (...) Shut up, Pam! Nobody asked you for an opinion! It's not 1994 anymore! (turns back to Kelly). I hope you enjoy this trophy and wear it with pride but remember what our.. what my roots are! Worship me or DIE!!!" The cliffhanger moment is spoiled by the theme music pumping through the speakers... "I'll be ready...." Dear lord, we're back in 1997 after all?
Tess Valmore thinks that Gena is lucky not to get whacked in the face by the buoy trophy as Kelly prefers to remain humble - for now that is - and openly admires the idea of Old vs New guard battle of strenght sooner rather than later. As controversial as Nolin is, she's the only former cast member who can give Kelly a fair run for the Baywatch money. Pamela Anderson will just have to enjoy these VHS tapes from 1994 when she dominated Nicole Eggert according to sleazy rumours spread around by David Hassellhoff, who else? The future is now though and Kelly Rohrbach is the undisputed future of the FCBA... with or without the lifeguard swimsuit!
Somewhere in Ohio an unemployed Brooklyn Decker cringes in disbelief...
Final result: Kelly Rohrbach def. Alexandra Daddario KO8.