Post by Lookout! Boxing on Feb 25, 2023 1:16:18 GMT -6
Brittany Snow v. Sienna Miller
(Results by Lookout, Words by Sceej)
Press conference: Ordinarily calm and classy Brittany Snow has been whipped into a rage, “I get it … I can read! So Tractorpull calls this fight ‘a poor matchup’ and acts like I am some tomato can to be knocked over so Sienna can ascend to the Hall of Fame? Well, my stablemates Jenny and Gena Lee have given me the low-down on that corrupt Hall and if Sienna thinks she’s waltzing in with a win over me, she’s got another thing coming!” Jenny McCarthy giving full throated support to Brit - ranting about corruption.
Sienna Miller bemused, “Hey … calm down! Don’t make me out to be the bad guy here! I didn’t challenge you - you challenged me! Hell yes I am looking forward to entering the Hall of Fame but no one said anything about ‘tomato cans’. I got to where I am by respecting every opponent they put in front of me - and then taking care of business!”
Rumors put blame for Snow’s baseless indignance with master strategist Scrubby McGee - when asked, the Irishman winks, “I’ll not dignify a question like dat wit a response”
Given respective positions within FCBA - sub .500 fighter trying to claw way back to relevance v fighter on cusp of Hall of Fame - Miller installed as massive favorite.
Fight Night: Brittany Snow, impatient in waiting area, white bikini, gloves and boots (playing on the “Snow” angle), when she hears Scrubby musing “Now will ya look at dat …” pointing on tub of ice and Dom Perignon outside the Empire dressing room, “Dey got da bottles on ice already for da celebration when dat goil wins and gets inta da Hall of Fame …” Scrubby electing to have Jenny Mac work the corner with him and both Snow and Mac are practically frothing at the mouth when they get call to got to the ring. When Miller leaves dressing room, accompanied by head trainer Stacy Kibeler and general manager Kate Beckinsale, she wonders, “Hey … who sprung for the champagne?” Kiebler and Beckinsale genuinely perplexed - card says it was sent by “S. McGee”?
Miller professional in the ring, bringing the heat in scarlet bikini, gloves and boots - contrast to “white as Snow”. Hard glare from Brittany … then the smack talk begins! Not from Brittany … not from Sienna … Jenny Mac giving an earful to a smirking Kate Beckinsale, who is demanding security “remove this trull immediately”. Mac not quite sure what a “trull” is but lunges at Kate anyway, who smiles sweetly as big Kiebs gets between them. At ringside, Sceej big girls Palicki, Lawley and Big Bad Gena Lee Nolin, who elbows Robyn and smirks, “This could get good, Stretch!” Things not settled down until fumbling Sceej Management can produce paperwork that Jenny McCarthy IS indeed registered as an assistant trainer with Sceej Boxing Beckinsale to Snow, “With that cavewoman training you, you shan’t have a chance!”
Round 1: Snow out of her corner hot, side to side shift, then heave bog sash weight right hand which Miller slips and pops Sceej girl with the jab. Brit whirls and bull rushed startled Sienna into the ropes, lets loose with both hands to the midriff, Miller jolted, Snow shorter but stronger through the shoulders. Sienna with elbows in tight, looking to roll with shots, but sheer volume is punishing her - ribs, biceps, shoulders. Some would say she is picking off the punches - and she is - but impact is cumulative. Miller in trouble on the ropes, rolling with punches to blunt the impact but she is taking punishment in volume. Finally she is able to duck a left hook and dance out to center ring. Snow a little punched out and Miller a little battered - round ends with them probing with jabs. First round big to the underdog.
Rounds 2-3: Sienna Miller getting read the riot act in the corner, “Fight’s already started, girl, time to fight back!” scolds Kiebler, head trainer - Miller responds with a boxing clinic! Sienna loose limbed, seemingly skipping around the ring, pumping jab, using edge in reach to keep fellow blond at bay. Brit looking to jab with and scoring with her own stick but the tally favors Sienna. Brit lashes hook to midriff and looks to hook jaw but Sienna beats her to the punch with a crunching right to the forehead which has Brit stumbling backward. Sienna follows up immediately with left to the midriff, left to the jaw and straight right hand to the bra line. Snow lashes back angrily with left hook but Miller dancing back and its only a grazing shot. Between rounds, McGee in Sceej corner calling for calm but getting only rage from Snow, fueled by Jenny McCarthy’s well thought out admonition to “Just kick that skank’s ass!”. Round 3 sees Miller go from winning to dominating as she dictates with legs and jab - picking when and where to open up. Snow scoring herself during firefights mid-ring but seems as though for every exchange, Sienna Miller scores the first AND the last punch. At end of the third, Miller fronts up and frustrated Snow shoves her violently. Referee between them quickly and McCarthy and Beckinsale screaming blue murder for a deduction of a point (absolutely no basis to do that).
Round 4: If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it! Sienna Miller back up on toes, jabbing, goading Snow, drawing wild right hands, then slipping the punch and making her pay. Miller jutting out chin to draw wild swings, counter and then backpedal. Toe catches canvas and she stubble awkwardly into ropes and Brittany pounces - she is all over Miller, Pinning to ropes and letting both hands go - body head and always always back to the body. Heavy leather has Sienna pinking up in the midriff as she gives up body to protect head with gloves and forearms. Snow is in great shape it appears as she is able to maintain steady volume and dominate the final minute of round and bring fight even through four.
Round 5: Scrubby in corner “Lissen, kid, when she does dat ting where she sticks da tongue out at ya? You feign wit da right - an den when she bounces back ya get on her, unnerstan? Left hook - body and jaw - an’ ya stay on her. Dis goil don’t like it to da body so dat’s what she gets from ya, unnerstan?”. Snow nodding. Flustered J-Mac feels the need to add, “And kick that skank’s ass!”
Miller out of corner with a little less energy - midriff showing signs of wear and hunched slightly forward - she may be cramping? Able to keep Snow at arm’s length with that educated jab but she’s not dictating like she was - seems a little skittish? Mid round - Miller gets saucy - sticks out her chin to bait Snow into a mistake - Snow tenses to throw right - Miller snakes neck back and slings back with her own right and walks right into crushing left hook from Snow! Sienna Miller wide eyed - that “how could you!” look on her pretty face. Legs unsteady and Snow is all over her. Gutting left uppercuts to the midriff .. one … two … a third … then chipping right hand behind the ear which drops the blonde to all fours and draws stunned reaction from the crowd. Snow glaring down - strong armed to neutral corner by referee as Sienna Miller shakes her pretty head trying to clear cobwebs. At seven, she tries to push herself up but legs not there and she tumbles to the side. Count passes and in a stunning upset - winner by KO in the 5th - Brittany Snow!
Aftermath - Sceej corner into ring to congratulate their blonde on this huge step up just as Empire seconds enter ring to assist hazy Sienna Miller back to her corner. Jenny Mac loudly calling for a “Walk of Shame”. Beckinsale mutters “... ill bred trull …” and McCarthy lunges and smacks Becks across the chops! “No one calls me a … a … a ‘troll’ and gets away with it, you … you … you troll!”. J-Mac looking to get after K-Becks … and that earns her a two handed shove from the towering Stacy Kiebler … and THAT in turn gets the Sceej bigs up and out of the ringside seats and into the ring in defense of their loud mouthed stablemate - Adrianne “The Chin Checker” Palicki … Robyn “Godzilla” Lawley … and Big Bad Gena Lee Nolin!
Kiebler and Beckinsale suddenly remember a very important appointment that they simply must keep … right now!
At ringside, Grad Wizard and Poindexter Del Crunchy enjoying the action. “Hey Pointy” asks the Man in the Hat, gesturing up to the Sceej girls, “Whaddya think? Any other stable gonna put up three that’s gonna take those three in a street fight?”.
The big man chuckles, “Three girls from one stable who are going to match with Palicki, Lawley and Nolin - that wrecking crew? Not bloody likely!”
(Results by Lookout, Words by Sceej)
Press conference: Ordinarily calm and classy Brittany Snow has been whipped into a rage, “I get it … I can read! So Tractorpull calls this fight ‘a poor matchup’ and acts like I am some tomato can to be knocked over so Sienna can ascend to the Hall of Fame? Well, my stablemates Jenny and Gena Lee have given me the low-down on that corrupt Hall and if Sienna thinks she’s waltzing in with a win over me, she’s got another thing coming!” Jenny McCarthy giving full throated support to Brit - ranting about corruption.
Sienna Miller bemused, “Hey … calm down! Don’t make me out to be the bad guy here! I didn’t challenge you - you challenged me! Hell yes I am looking forward to entering the Hall of Fame but no one said anything about ‘tomato cans’. I got to where I am by respecting every opponent they put in front of me - and then taking care of business!”
Rumors put blame for Snow’s baseless indignance with master strategist Scrubby McGee - when asked, the Irishman winks, “I’ll not dignify a question like dat wit a response”
Given respective positions within FCBA - sub .500 fighter trying to claw way back to relevance v fighter on cusp of Hall of Fame - Miller installed as massive favorite.
Fight Night: Brittany Snow, impatient in waiting area, white bikini, gloves and boots (playing on the “Snow” angle), when she hears Scrubby musing “Now will ya look at dat …” pointing on tub of ice and Dom Perignon outside the Empire dressing room, “Dey got da bottles on ice already for da celebration when dat goil wins and gets inta da Hall of Fame …” Scrubby electing to have Jenny Mac work the corner with him and both Snow and Mac are practically frothing at the mouth when they get call to got to the ring. When Miller leaves dressing room, accompanied by head trainer Stacy Kibeler and general manager Kate Beckinsale, she wonders, “Hey … who sprung for the champagne?” Kiebler and Beckinsale genuinely perplexed - card says it was sent by “S. McGee”?
Miller professional in the ring, bringing the heat in scarlet bikini, gloves and boots - contrast to “white as Snow”. Hard glare from Brittany … then the smack talk begins! Not from Brittany … not from Sienna … Jenny Mac giving an earful to a smirking Kate Beckinsale, who is demanding security “remove this trull immediately”. Mac not quite sure what a “trull” is but lunges at Kate anyway, who smiles sweetly as big Kiebs gets between them. At ringside, Sceej big girls Palicki, Lawley and Big Bad Gena Lee Nolin, who elbows Robyn and smirks, “This could get good, Stretch!” Things not settled down until fumbling Sceej Management can produce paperwork that Jenny McCarthy IS indeed registered as an assistant trainer with Sceej Boxing Beckinsale to Snow, “With that cavewoman training you, you shan’t have a chance!”
Round 1: Snow out of her corner hot, side to side shift, then heave bog sash weight right hand which Miller slips and pops Sceej girl with the jab. Brit whirls and bull rushed startled Sienna into the ropes, lets loose with both hands to the midriff, Miller jolted, Snow shorter but stronger through the shoulders. Sienna with elbows in tight, looking to roll with shots, but sheer volume is punishing her - ribs, biceps, shoulders. Some would say she is picking off the punches - and she is - but impact is cumulative. Miller in trouble on the ropes, rolling with punches to blunt the impact but she is taking punishment in volume. Finally she is able to duck a left hook and dance out to center ring. Snow a little punched out and Miller a little battered - round ends with them probing with jabs. First round big to the underdog.
Rounds 2-3: Sienna Miller getting read the riot act in the corner, “Fight’s already started, girl, time to fight back!” scolds Kiebler, head trainer - Miller responds with a boxing clinic! Sienna loose limbed, seemingly skipping around the ring, pumping jab, using edge in reach to keep fellow blond at bay. Brit looking to jab with and scoring with her own stick but the tally favors Sienna. Brit lashes hook to midriff and looks to hook jaw but Sienna beats her to the punch with a crunching right to the forehead which has Brit stumbling backward. Sienna follows up immediately with left to the midriff, left to the jaw and straight right hand to the bra line. Snow lashes back angrily with left hook but Miller dancing back and its only a grazing shot. Between rounds, McGee in Sceej corner calling for calm but getting only rage from Snow, fueled by Jenny McCarthy’s well thought out admonition to “Just kick that skank’s ass!”. Round 3 sees Miller go from winning to dominating as she dictates with legs and jab - picking when and where to open up. Snow scoring herself during firefights mid-ring but seems as though for every exchange, Sienna Miller scores the first AND the last punch. At end of the third, Miller fronts up and frustrated Snow shoves her violently. Referee between them quickly and McCarthy and Beckinsale screaming blue murder for a deduction of a point (absolutely no basis to do that).
Round 4: If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it! Sienna Miller back up on toes, jabbing, goading Snow, drawing wild right hands, then slipping the punch and making her pay. Miller jutting out chin to draw wild swings, counter and then backpedal. Toe catches canvas and she stubble awkwardly into ropes and Brittany pounces - she is all over Miller, Pinning to ropes and letting both hands go - body head and always always back to the body. Heavy leather has Sienna pinking up in the midriff as she gives up body to protect head with gloves and forearms. Snow is in great shape it appears as she is able to maintain steady volume and dominate the final minute of round and bring fight even through four.
Round 5: Scrubby in corner “Lissen, kid, when she does dat ting where she sticks da tongue out at ya? You feign wit da right - an den when she bounces back ya get on her, unnerstan? Left hook - body and jaw - an’ ya stay on her. Dis goil don’t like it to da body so dat’s what she gets from ya, unnerstan?”. Snow nodding. Flustered J-Mac feels the need to add, “And kick that skank’s ass!”
Miller out of corner with a little less energy - midriff showing signs of wear and hunched slightly forward - she may be cramping? Able to keep Snow at arm’s length with that educated jab but she’s not dictating like she was - seems a little skittish? Mid round - Miller gets saucy - sticks out her chin to bait Snow into a mistake - Snow tenses to throw right - Miller snakes neck back and slings back with her own right and walks right into crushing left hook from Snow! Sienna Miller wide eyed - that “how could you!” look on her pretty face. Legs unsteady and Snow is all over her. Gutting left uppercuts to the midriff .. one … two … a third … then chipping right hand behind the ear which drops the blonde to all fours and draws stunned reaction from the crowd. Snow glaring down - strong armed to neutral corner by referee as Sienna Miller shakes her pretty head trying to clear cobwebs. At seven, she tries to push herself up but legs not there and she tumbles to the side. Count passes and in a stunning upset - winner by KO in the 5th - Brittany Snow!
Aftermath - Sceej corner into ring to congratulate their blonde on this huge step up just as Empire seconds enter ring to assist hazy Sienna Miller back to her corner. Jenny Mac loudly calling for a “Walk of Shame”. Beckinsale mutters “... ill bred trull …” and McCarthy lunges and smacks Becks across the chops! “No one calls me a … a … a ‘troll’ and gets away with it, you … you … you troll!”. J-Mac looking to get after K-Becks … and that earns her a two handed shove from the towering Stacy Kiebler … and THAT in turn gets the Sceej bigs up and out of the ringside seats and into the ring in defense of their loud mouthed stablemate - Adrianne “The Chin Checker” Palicki … Robyn “Godzilla” Lawley … and Big Bad Gena Lee Nolin!
Kiebler and Beckinsale suddenly remember a very important appointment that they simply must keep … right now!
At ringside, Grad Wizard and Poindexter Del Crunchy enjoying the action. “Hey Pointy” asks the Man in the Hat, gesturing up to the Sceej girls, “Whaddya think? Any other stable gonna put up three that’s gonna take those three in a street fight?”.
The big man chuckles, “Three girls from one stable who are going to match with Palicki, Lawley and Nolin - that wrecking crew? Not bloody likely!”