Post by HBO's Boxing At The Asylum on Mar 31, 2021 13:32:32 GMT -6
BEFORE:
"It's been a while," says Carly Rae with a shake of the head, "And, we all know WHY. I gave girls problems and my phone stopped ringing. Well. Here's another chance, and I'm going to make the most of it."
"Yeah," Billie admits with a nod, "I've watched her video. She can fight. But. She's not getting her hand raised tonight."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Call Me Maybe' you hear behind us, and that can only mean the singer of that tune, Mission, Canada's own Carly Rae Jepsen is coming to ringside..."
Cassie: "And, this is Jepsen's Asylum debut. She HAS fought a Front Street fighter before, Kristen Stewart, but that went down on pay-per-view..."
McCarthy: "BUT, she's STILL a Typical Dancing Hooker Opponent with NO FCBA wins!"
O'Dell: "Jepsen into the ring and helped off with the robe. She's wearing an orange and pink striped number and looking plenty fetching in it, if the crowd reaction is any indication. And, that's 'You Should See Me In A Crown' hammering through the arena, and that means the singer of THAT tune, 'Buxom' Billie Eilish is on her way to the ring."
Tess: "Eilish off to a great start for Front Street, and, she's looking to take a big step this year."
O'Dell: "Billie wasting no time getting down the aisle and into the ring. She's helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve to reveal that emerald number we've seen before, and the crowd popping once again..."
Cassie: "Here's where Mac threatens to show off her wrinkling form..."
McCarthy: "WRINK...you LITTLE..."
O'Dell: "Now, calm DOWN, Mac. The ladies are about ready. Time for some picks. Tess likes Billie. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Typical Dancing Hooker Opponent! Eilish!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "Three for three. Let's see if the ladies are right. Billie wasting no time going after the older singer. Eilish stepping to and making with the heavy leather and, that quickly, Carly Rae is on the back foot, covering up, as Billie goes body/head/body, backing her rival up again and again..."
Cassie: "Carly Rae likes to play D and fight counter, but she doesn't want to be fighting Billie on THESE terms..."
O'Dell: "She does not. No question Billie has the advantage in power, and she's been able to bring it to bear early. Jepsen backed to the ropes now. She's covering up as Eilish goes body. American just having her WAY with the Canadian right now. Carly Rae can't find any answers..."
McCarthy: "Which is why she's a Typical Dancing Hooker Opponent..."
O'Dell: "Under thirty in the first. It's been almost all Eilish so far. Billie hasn't been able to hurt the older woman, but she's roughed her up plenty and piled up a bunch of points. Good left hook from the American and there's the bell. No doubt about it. Eilish and very wide, too."
Tess: "Good start for Billie, up 10-9."
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "Jepsen getting the gloves up now. She's moving laterally, forcing Eilish to work to square. When the American does, and comes forward, Jepsen lets the hands go, stopping her with accurate flurries, then she moves off the spot. This is an interesting adjustment for Jepsen..."
Cassie: "If you remember the Stewart fight, Carly Rae made some hay fighting in counter, playing defense. But, against Eilish, that kind of static D isn't going to work, so..."
O'Dell: "More of a war of movement, and it's having the desired effect. Billie's not getting to spots very well at the moment. She's trying to square up the older woman, but unable to do it. And, when she does, Jepsen's either getting off first or scoring well enough in counter to prevent the American from closing and banging."
Tess: "GOOD right hand counter by Jepsen..."
O'Dell: "Good round all around by Jepsen. She's found some things that are working, and, after being all but overwhelmed in the opening stanza, she's gotten right back into the fight. Good exchange. Both fighters landed a solid right hand and there's the bell. No doubt about this one, either. Jepsen. Wide."
McCarthy: "And, we're even at 19."
ROUND THREE:
O'Dell: "Jepsen with those gloves up, using the lateral movement, giving a little ground here and there. Eilish a bit more patient now. She's moving her own feet, working hard to square her rival up, while Carly Rae probes here and there with the jab, looking to hold Billie for a flurry..."
McCarthy: "Almost seeing a first-round recon here in the third..."
O'Dell: "That's about the size of it. Canadian wants to fight on the counter, and the American isn't going to make it easy for her by getting too aggressive here. Instead, Billie doing a lot of moving herself. Looking to line the older woman up with that left hand, and able to get off here and there after she does so."
Cassie: "People don't realize how athletic Billie is. She's a former dancer and she moves VERY well."
O'Dell: "You're seeing that now, but Jepsen, with her excellent defense and accurate counter punches, is making things difficult for her. Ten seconds to go. Billie with a right hand and Carly Rae answers with a quick countering flurry and there's the bell. Very close. Jepsen."
Tess: "And the Canadian on top now 29-28."
ROUND FOUR:
O'Dell: "Fourth begins and the ladies still working the feet. Carly Rae's working the counters, keeping the gloves up, moving laterally. Billie not trying to close now, just trying to line her rival up with that left jab so that she can drop in the hard rights. Nice patience being shown by Eilish here..."
Cassie: "Absolutely. Here's a girl who just turned 19 a few months ago, and she's staying sound, not getting overly aggressive."
O'Dell: "For her part, though, Jepsen's getting what she wants in this fight. She's slowing things down, not letting Billie get her offense going, not getting involved in heavy fire fights, which would surely benefit Eilish. Instead, she's working at pace, and scoring well in counter."
Tess: "Timing things well, too. She gets off quickly, gets the gloves back just as quickly."
O'Dell: "Down to fifteen remaining in the fourth. It's been another two-way round. Nice right hand there from Jepsen off the counter, and there's another. Eilish jabbing, looking to follow, but the right hand blocked, and there's the bell. Carly Rae gets the round close again."
McCarthy: "And Jepsen is up two 39-37."
ROUND FIVE:
O'Dell: "Fifth begins with Eilish stepping to again, only she's working body now. Billie hooking ribs and midsection, crowding her rival. Carly Rae with the hands up, but the younger woman not bothering to try to break through the guard. Instead, she's tenderizing meat, and we can hear the WHACKS as they're just above us now..."
McCarthy: "Ref needs to watch for low blows!"
O'Dell: "Nothing below the belt, but Billie banging away to the tummy. Carly Rae tying up now, trying to get a break. Billie levers her with the shoulder and ROCKS HER WITH A RIGHT HOOK! Jepsen stumbles into the ropes above us and might have gone down without them..."
Tess: "She is in DEEP trouble..."
O'Dell: "No doubt about it. Eilish letting the hands go now, banging away against the Canadian's high guard. Carly Rae rolling with, blocking, hanging on. GOOD right from Billie split the gloves and shook the older woman. Ref on alert, but there's the bell. Jepsen survives, but Eilish takes the fifth wide."
Cassie: "But still trails by a point, 48-47."
ROUND SIX:
O'Dell: "Eilish right after Jepsen to start the sixth. Carly Rae giving ground, keeping the guard high. Legs still a bit unsteady and Billie taking advantage. She's lining the older woman up, backing her up, using the jab then following on with right hands. Canadian trying to play for time here, ladies..."
Cassie: "And, Billie not cooperating..."
O'Dell: "She is not. Eilish very aggressive, cleaning up right now, but she wants more than that. She's looking to finish thing thing and DOWN GOES JEPSEN! Left jab from Billie and then a quick follow on right that landed behind the gloves and sent Carly Rae crashing to her back!"
Tess: "And, that might do it..."
O'Dell: "Eilish to a neutral corner. Referee's count at three, four. Five. No movement at all from Jepsen as the numbers mount. Six. Seven. Eight. This is going to be academic. Nine. TEN! It's OVER! Jepsen both down and out and it's OVER and your winner by KO6 is 'Buxom' Billie Eilish!"
McCarthy: "More luck for Weirdo's Dancing Hookers!"
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Billie Eilish, and, Billie, she caused some problems with that slick defense."
Billie (nodding): "Yeah. With a counter puncher like her, you have to balance the aggression and find ways to break down her defense. It was challenging, but I found a way."
Tess: "Your sophomore season is off to a good start..."
Billie (nodding): "Yeah, but we have a long way to go and a lot of work to do in 2021."
"It's been a while," says Carly Rae with a shake of the head, "And, we all know WHY. I gave girls problems and my phone stopped ringing. Well. Here's another chance, and I'm going to make the most of it."
"Yeah," Billie admits with a nod, "I've watched her video. She can fight. But. She's not getting her hand raised tonight."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Call Me Maybe' you hear behind us, and that can only mean the singer of that tune, Mission, Canada's own Carly Rae Jepsen is coming to ringside..."
Cassie: "And, this is Jepsen's Asylum debut. She HAS fought a Front Street fighter before, Kristen Stewart, but that went down on pay-per-view..."
McCarthy: "BUT, she's STILL a Typical Dancing Hooker Opponent with NO FCBA wins!"
O'Dell: "Jepsen into the ring and helped off with the robe. She's wearing an orange and pink striped number and looking plenty fetching in it, if the crowd reaction is any indication. And, that's 'You Should See Me In A Crown' hammering through the arena, and that means the singer of THAT tune, 'Buxom' Billie Eilish is on her way to the ring."
Tess: "Eilish off to a great start for Front Street, and, she's looking to take a big step this year."
O'Dell: "Billie wasting no time getting down the aisle and into the ring. She's helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve to reveal that emerald number we've seen before, and the crowd popping once again..."
Cassie: "Here's where Mac threatens to show off her wrinkling form..."
McCarthy: "WRINK...you LITTLE..."
O'Dell: "Now, calm DOWN, Mac. The ladies are about ready. Time for some picks. Tess likes Billie. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Typical Dancing Hooker Opponent! Eilish!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "Three for three. Let's see if the ladies are right. Billie wasting no time going after the older singer. Eilish stepping to and making with the heavy leather and, that quickly, Carly Rae is on the back foot, covering up, as Billie goes body/head/body, backing her rival up again and again..."
Cassie: "Carly Rae likes to play D and fight counter, but she doesn't want to be fighting Billie on THESE terms..."
O'Dell: "She does not. No question Billie has the advantage in power, and she's been able to bring it to bear early. Jepsen backed to the ropes now. She's covering up as Eilish goes body. American just having her WAY with the Canadian right now. Carly Rae can't find any answers..."
McCarthy: "Which is why she's a Typical Dancing Hooker Opponent..."
O'Dell: "Under thirty in the first. It's been almost all Eilish so far. Billie hasn't been able to hurt the older woman, but she's roughed her up plenty and piled up a bunch of points. Good left hook from the American and there's the bell. No doubt about it. Eilish and very wide, too."
Tess: "Good start for Billie, up 10-9."
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "Jepsen getting the gloves up now. She's moving laterally, forcing Eilish to work to square. When the American does, and comes forward, Jepsen lets the hands go, stopping her with accurate flurries, then she moves off the spot. This is an interesting adjustment for Jepsen..."
Cassie: "If you remember the Stewart fight, Carly Rae made some hay fighting in counter, playing defense. But, against Eilish, that kind of static D isn't going to work, so..."
O'Dell: "More of a war of movement, and it's having the desired effect. Billie's not getting to spots very well at the moment. She's trying to square up the older woman, but unable to do it. And, when she does, Jepsen's either getting off first or scoring well enough in counter to prevent the American from closing and banging."
Tess: "GOOD right hand counter by Jepsen..."
O'Dell: "Good round all around by Jepsen. She's found some things that are working, and, after being all but overwhelmed in the opening stanza, she's gotten right back into the fight. Good exchange. Both fighters landed a solid right hand and there's the bell. No doubt about this one, either. Jepsen. Wide."
McCarthy: "And, we're even at 19."
ROUND THREE:
O'Dell: "Jepsen with those gloves up, using the lateral movement, giving a little ground here and there. Eilish a bit more patient now. She's moving her own feet, working hard to square her rival up, while Carly Rae probes here and there with the jab, looking to hold Billie for a flurry..."
McCarthy: "Almost seeing a first-round recon here in the third..."
O'Dell: "That's about the size of it. Canadian wants to fight on the counter, and the American isn't going to make it easy for her by getting too aggressive here. Instead, Billie doing a lot of moving herself. Looking to line the older woman up with that left hand, and able to get off here and there after she does so."
Cassie: "People don't realize how athletic Billie is. She's a former dancer and she moves VERY well."
O'Dell: "You're seeing that now, but Jepsen, with her excellent defense and accurate counter punches, is making things difficult for her. Ten seconds to go. Billie with a right hand and Carly Rae answers with a quick countering flurry and there's the bell. Very close. Jepsen."
Tess: "And the Canadian on top now 29-28."
ROUND FOUR:
O'Dell: "Fourth begins and the ladies still working the feet. Carly Rae's working the counters, keeping the gloves up, moving laterally. Billie not trying to close now, just trying to line her rival up with that left jab so that she can drop in the hard rights. Nice patience being shown by Eilish here..."
Cassie: "Absolutely. Here's a girl who just turned 19 a few months ago, and she's staying sound, not getting overly aggressive."
O'Dell: "For her part, though, Jepsen's getting what she wants in this fight. She's slowing things down, not letting Billie get her offense going, not getting involved in heavy fire fights, which would surely benefit Eilish. Instead, she's working at pace, and scoring well in counter."
Tess: "Timing things well, too. She gets off quickly, gets the gloves back just as quickly."
O'Dell: "Down to fifteen remaining in the fourth. It's been another two-way round. Nice right hand there from Jepsen off the counter, and there's another. Eilish jabbing, looking to follow, but the right hand blocked, and there's the bell. Carly Rae gets the round close again."
McCarthy: "And Jepsen is up two 39-37."
ROUND FIVE:
O'Dell: "Fifth begins with Eilish stepping to again, only she's working body now. Billie hooking ribs and midsection, crowding her rival. Carly Rae with the hands up, but the younger woman not bothering to try to break through the guard. Instead, she's tenderizing meat, and we can hear the WHACKS as they're just above us now..."
McCarthy: "Ref needs to watch for low blows!"
O'Dell: "Nothing below the belt, but Billie banging away to the tummy. Carly Rae tying up now, trying to get a break. Billie levers her with the shoulder and ROCKS HER WITH A RIGHT HOOK! Jepsen stumbles into the ropes above us and might have gone down without them..."
Tess: "She is in DEEP trouble..."
O'Dell: "No doubt about it. Eilish letting the hands go now, banging away against the Canadian's high guard. Carly Rae rolling with, blocking, hanging on. GOOD right from Billie split the gloves and shook the older woman. Ref on alert, but there's the bell. Jepsen survives, but Eilish takes the fifth wide."
Cassie: "But still trails by a point, 48-47."
ROUND SIX:
O'Dell: "Eilish right after Jepsen to start the sixth. Carly Rae giving ground, keeping the guard high. Legs still a bit unsteady and Billie taking advantage. She's lining the older woman up, backing her up, using the jab then following on with right hands. Canadian trying to play for time here, ladies..."
Cassie: "And, Billie not cooperating..."
O'Dell: "She is not. Eilish very aggressive, cleaning up right now, but she wants more than that. She's looking to finish thing thing and DOWN GOES JEPSEN! Left jab from Billie and then a quick follow on right that landed behind the gloves and sent Carly Rae crashing to her back!"
Tess: "And, that might do it..."
O'Dell: "Eilish to a neutral corner. Referee's count at three, four. Five. No movement at all from Jepsen as the numbers mount. Six. Seven. Eight. This is going to be academic. Nine. TEN! It's OVER! Jepsen both down and out and it's OVER and your winner by KO6 is 'Buxom' Billie Eilish!"
McCarthy: "More luck for Weirdo's Dancing Hookers!"
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Billie Eilish, and, Billie, she caused some problems with that slick defense."
Billie (nodding): "Yeah. With a counter puncher like her, you have to balance the aggression and find ways to break down her defense. It was challenging, but I found a way."
Tess: "Your sophomore season is off to a good start..."
Billie (nodding): "Yeah, but we have a long way to go and a lot of work to do in 2021."
