Alanah Pearce (Comediennes) v Khloe Kardashian (Free Agent)

Alanah Pearce
(27 / 5’10” / 0:1 FCBA / The Comediennes)

Khloe Kardashian
(36 / 5’10” / 4:7 FCBA / Free Agent)

Story: The Comediennes / Results: Lookout!

Pre-fight:

“Well it’s my first official fight as a Comedienne so I have to keep the emotions in check,” says Alanah. “I took a bad loss to Daddario and while I’d love to fight her again I have some upcoming business with Ashley Graham. So we thought it important I fight a bona fide welter. She’s got size and power, so it’ll be a nice litmus test to see what might work in the PPV and what might not.”

“She thinks this is some kind of tune up fight,” says Khloe. “It’s going to be a massacre. Just watch. I’m tired of losing. Kim is 7-2 over the last 2 years in the FCBA. I’m looking to make a run like that too and it starts with the new girl who couldn’t even beat the queen of mediocre herself, Alex Daddario.”

R1: Khloe comes out fast, snapping jabs. It’s clear she’s gotten into tremendous shape for this fight. She has Alanah off balance early with her blitz, causing the blonde to keep her guard up.

But Khloe shows enough power to continue to break through Alanah’s guard. She crashes a right hook into Alanah’s gloves, causing them to drop down and Khloe snaps a left hook clean on Alanah’s jaw. The blonde is dazed early and Khloe tries to make the most of it.

She chases after the staggered Alanah, landing a brutal right cross that knocks the brand new Comedienne back into the ropes. Khloe throws a wild flurry of combos, snapping Alanah’s head back with each connection. The Aussie looks like she doesn’t have any sort of answer and she’s in tons of trouble early!

Alanah does the smart thing and keeps her defense up as tight as she can before finally slicing through with a right hand. It’s enough to get Khloe to lay off of her, and when Khloe comes back in for more Alanah uses her superior footwork to stick and move. She lands a few clean shots to Khloe’s dome before the bell rings.

Pearce survives the early slaughter, but Kardashian takes the round wide, 10-9.

R2: Khloe comes out the aggressor again, but Alanah does a much better job managing it.

She blocks and counter-punches, slides out of the way, and comes away clean from a number of Khloe blitzes. This leaves Khloe a little drained as she tries to do too much at once. As the gloves drop Alanah takes advantage.

A jab… another jab… another jab… a right… a jab… a right… she tags Khloe. Kardashian is the one eating the punishment now. Alanah’s approach much less brawler like and way more technical. Her strikes are precise and efficient, carving through Khloe’s lukewarm defense.

Alanah clearly looking like the more prepared boxer as we bleed into the last minute of round two. She has her jab working well and is mixing in her right to a high impact.

But then Khloe finds a second wind and throttles Alanah with a swooping right hand to the ribs. Alanah basically folds over Khloe’s right. Kardashian pulls back her left and nails Alanah square on the jaw with it. Alanah is HURT.

She backs off, keeping her hands up as Khloe goes head hunting. Khloe recklessly swings that right and it crashes into the side of Alanah’s cranium. She stumbles but stays on her feet. Khloe changes her strategy and starts beating Alanah’s body with powerhouse blows. The bell rings with a visibly agonizing Alanah huffing and puffing her way to the corner.

With the late flurry Khloe is able to steal the round. 20-18 Kardashian.

R3: The momentum Khloe gained at the end of round two carries over into round three. Alanah can’t squirm away from her aggressive opponent and is met with crushing right hands into her torso.

It’s not a boxing match, it’s a beatdown. Alanah is able to stay on her feet, but the question soon becomes for how long.

The Comedienne is playing enough defense and counter punching enough to keep the fight going, but she keeps eating shots she can’t afford to be eating. An uppercut from Khloe causes the crowd to let out a sympathetic groan.

Plain and simple, Alanah is getting out slugged.

Pinned to the ropes, Alanah tries to sneak something past Khloe’s barrage of attacks and she does! A right straight to the nose and Khloe’s eyes are watering after that one. It’s the break Alanah needed. She punches her way off of the ropes and gets herself back to the middle of the ring. Khloe throwing punches with tears in her eyes causes a lot of her shots to be way off target.

Alanah slices through with that precision she showed early last round and doesn’t look back. Slicing and dicing Khloe while avoiding any and all offense to boot. By the end of the round it’s Alanah with Khloe on the ropes. The bell rings as Alanah finally gets her first round.

29-28 Kardashian.

R4: The momentum has swung back and forth like crazy this fight. Khloe puts up a good fight early in the round as the two girls stand tall and just trade punches center-stage.

But Kardashian’s arms are starting to show fatigue while Alanah’s keep on trucking. She’s fighting smarter while Khloe is fighting harder.

The result? A red-faced panting Kardashian getting bullied around the ring for the final two minutes of the fight. Alanah takes this round wide and ties it up!

38-38.

R5: Alanah looks real smooth coming out of her corner. Khloe can’t catch her with anything significant while the Aussie keeps pounding away with her jab. She snaps Khloe’s head back so often she looks like a bobble head.

Plus, Alanah has the better footwork and sounder defense. Khloe out of her element as she’s allowed Alanah to shift the fight into the pace she wants, leaving Khloe’s brawling strategy out the window.

Khloe can feel the fight getting away, so she has to bide her time. She takes more licks from Alanah… but it’s just enough to lure The Comedienne into a false sense of security. Right when it seems like Khloe is completely drained she sticks her left foot into the canvas and throws a right cross to Alanah’s cheek.

It’s a huge punch as Alanah is clearly fuzzy after eating it. That gives Khloe just enough time to go to work with a savage display of bodywork. Her gloves work Alanah’s body like a punching bag as the Aussie even lets out similar puffs of air with every mighty blow. Alanah’s mobility advantage is gone as every move she makes puts her in agonizing pain. She lets her hands drift down ever so slightly and that’s all Khloe needs.

A devastating right hook sends Alanah spinning to the canvas.

Khloe raises her arms up over her head, certain she just ended the fight. But Alanah begins to stir at around 4 and is on her feet by 8. The ref makes sure that Alanah is okay to continue and the fighters meet back in the middle of the ring.

It’s all Khloe the rest of the round as Alanah smartly stays defensive and flees from any more serious trouble. Kardashian lands a few more solid knocks, but nothing to put Alanah back down.

48-46 Kardashian.

R6: It’s clear Alanah’s strategy isn’t to stand and brawl with Khloe. As the round starts Alanah only gives herself a modicum amount of space from her corner. Khloe charges, but Alanah is able to slip away.

The round proceeds for the next minute with Khloe chasing after Alanah. The crowd starts to get restless at the lack of action. Alanah wants no part of Khloe’s powerbombs, but it’s all Khloe wants to throw.

Eventually though Khloe lands one and Alanah goes crashing into a corner. The crowd raises to their feet. They can sense the knockout coming. Khloe lays on a staggering amount of punishment to Alanah’s body. The Aussie is trapped in her corner getting pounded into dust. She tries to wrap up in a clinch, but Khloe pushes her back into the corner and continues the slaughter when they break apart.

Alanah keeps her hands up, desperate for any sort of opening. Khloe’s gloves smack her body with left and rights until the guard drops again.

BAM

Khloe hits Alanah with an uppercut.

BAM

A left hook and Alanah drifts to her side, catching herself on the top rope. She turns and is met with another left cross.

Khloe doesn’t know Alanah is still standing.

The Aussie throws her arms around Khloe again, just trying push her way out of the corner. Khloe isn’t having it as she doesn’t budge an inch. They break apart and it’s more haymakers slamming into Alanah’s face. It’s getting really ugly now.

Alanah’s eyes drift into the crowd… she squints at something and then out of desperation throws her right fist in an uppercut motion. It hits Khloe clean on the chin.

Out of absolutely nowhere Alanah knocks Khloe flat on her back! Alanah looks down at her opponent in disbelief. Khloe’s blinking rapidly.

The ref is standing over her, the count is to 6. Khloe attempts to get to her feet but she stumbles backwards. The ref finishes the 10 count.

Miraculously Alanah Pearce wins via KO Round 6.

Post-fight:

Alanah’s post fight celebration is reserved, if not completely shocked. She staggers around the ring until she falls into the arms of her new teammates Elyse Willems and Whitney Cummings. They squeeze her tight and walk her over to her corner.

“I can’t believe that happened,” says a clearly struggling Alanah. “It’s definitely a shocker. I guess we were getting to the end of the round anyway so I should have been able to survive but… I looked out into the crowd and saw Elyse telling me to throw my uppercut. I did and it landed and it put her on the canvas. And then I won. So… thanks Elyse, I guess!”

“I can’t believe that happened,” says a dumbfounded Khloe. “She was finished! A slab of meat in the corner that I tenderized with brutal efficiency. Then all of a sudden she pulls that uppercut out of her back pocket! HOW? If there’s ever a need for a rematch it’s right here. I out fought her and somehow she won… unbelievable!”