Post by HBO's Boxing At The Asylum on Aug 31, 2020 10:29:32 GMT -6
BEFORE:
"I keep hearing about this girl being JMD champ and all that," says Lindsay with a smile. "Well, I've BEEN JMD champ. And, that's why this isn't a JMD bout. Won't save her, though. I'm still whipping her a**."
"Someone's getting an a**whipping tonight," says a hard-eyed Ariel. "And, Lindsay isn't going to like it when she finds out who."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Rumors' and the singer of that hit tune, Lindsay Lohan, is on her way to ringside."
McCarthy: "As a singer, she makes a good actress. And she can't act at ALL."
Cassie: "Look who's talking...on BOTH counts!"
McCarthy: "I'll have you know my thespiananity is beyond reproach! And SHUT UP, SCABBO!"
O'Dell (sighing): "Lohan into the ring and helped off with the robe, and she's certainly looking like she's been putting in the work for this one in that Egyptian blue bikini. And, that's 'I Knew You Were Trouble' you hear behind us, and here comes the singer of this particular cover version of that song, Ariel 'Dangerous Curves' Winter!"
Tess: "And, Winter definitely one of the girls Front Street may be pushing for a flyweight title shot in the last few months of the year. And, if she wants that to happen, she needs a result tonight."
O'Dell: "Ariel into the ring and helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve. She's got the crowd going with that curve-hugging white number we've seen before. And, the ladies are about ready. Time for some picks. Tess likes Ariel. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Winter's a typical Dancing Hooker and Lohan can fight. Lindsay!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "There's the bell. Lohan right after Ariel, stepping to and banging away and Winter more than willing to fight on these terms. Redhead and brunette in the phone booth banging body. Lindsay making no effort to use the reach or box, she's going to bring the physical and now she's going RACK..."
McCarthy: "And, Winter answering in kind!"
O'Dell: "It is ON in there. No pretense about any of this. It's all mugging, jug and otherwise. GOOD right hand by Lohan and WINTER HURTS HER TO THE RACK! Lindsay frozen by a right hook to the jug and then DROPPED BY A RIGHT UPPERCUT TO THE CHIN! What a shot that was!"
Cassie (singing): "Turn out the liiiigggghhhhtttssss. The party's ohhhhhverrrrrrrr..."
O'Dell: "Ariel to a neutral corner. Lindsay down on her back in the middle of the ring, eyes closed. Count at three. Four. Five. No movement at ALL from the redhead. Six. Seven. Not going to happen. She's OUT. Nine. TEN! It's OVER! And your winner by KO1 is Ariel "Dangerous Curves' Winter!"
Tess: "Speaking of girls who might be in the title picture..."
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Ariel Winter, and, Ariel, THAT didn't take long..."
Ariel (smiling): "I've got to admit, I didn't expect her to try that with me. I mean, she's taller and she's got a lot of experience, so, I figured she'd box or something. But. If you want to get in my grill, well. You saw what happened."
Tess: "I'd ask what's net for you, but I know the answer..."
Ariel (smiling): "Whatever I need to do to get a shot at those belts. You out there, Nat?"
"I keep hearing about this girl being JMD champ and all that," says Lindsay with a smile. "Well, I've BEEN JMD champ. And, that's why this isn't a JMD bout. Won't save her, though. I'm still whipping her a**."
"Someone's getting an a**whipping tonight," says a hard-eyed Ariel. "And, Lindsay isn't going to like it when she finds out who."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Rumors' and the singer of that hit tune, Lindsay Lohan, is on her way to ringside."
McCarthy: "As a singer, she makes a good actress. And she can't act at ALL."
Cassie: "Look who's talking...on BOTH counts!"
McCarthy: "I'll have you know my thespiananity is beyond reproach! And SHUT UP, SCABBO!"
O'Dell (sighing): "Lohan into the ring and helped off with the robe, and she's certainly looking like she's been putting in the work for this one in that Egyptian blue bikini. And, that's 'I Knew You Were Trouble' you hear behind us, and here comes the singer of this particular cover version of that song, Ariel 'Dangerous Curves' Winter!"
Tess: "And, Winter definitely one of the girls Front Street may be pushing for a flyweight title shot in the last few months of the year. And, if she wants that to happen, she needs a result tonight."
O'Dell: "Ariel into the ring and helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve. She's got the crowd going with that curve-hugging white number we've seen before. And, the ladies are about ready. Time for some picks. Tess likes Ariel. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Winter's a typical Dancing Hooker and Lohan can fight. Lindsay!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "There's the bell. Lohan right after Ariel, stepping to and banging away and Winter more than willing to fight on these terms. Redhead and brunette in the phone booth banging body. Lindsay making no effort to use the reach or box, she's going to bring the physical and now she's going RACK..."
McCarthy: "And, Winter answering in kind!"
O'Dell: "It is ON in there. No pretense about any of this. It's all mugging, jug and otherwise. GOOD right hand by Lohan and WINTER HURTS HER TO THE RACK! Lindsay frozen by a right hook to the jug and then DROPPED BY A RIGHT UPPERCUT TO THE CHIN! What a shot that was!"
Cassie (singing): "Turn out the liiiigggghhhhtttssss. The party's ohhhhhverrrrrrrr..."
O'Dell: "Ariel to a neutral corner. Lindsay down on her back in the middle of the ring, eyes closed. Count at three. Four. Five. No movement at ALL from the redhead. Six. Seven. Not going to happen. She's OUT. Nine. TEN! It's OVER! And your winner by KO1 is Ariel "Dangerous Curves' Winter!"
Tess: "Speaking of girls who might be in the title picture..."
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Ariel Winter, and, Ariel, THAT didn't take long..."
Ariel (smiling): "I've got to admit, I didn't expect her to try that with me. I mean, she's taller and she's got a lot of experience, so, I figured she'd box or something. But. If you want to get in my grill, well. You saw what happened."
Tess: "I'd ask what's net for you, but I know the answer..."
Ariel (smiling): "Whatever I need to do to get a shot at those belts. You out there, Nat?"