Post by HBO's Boxing At The Asylum on May 31, 2019 21:50:23 GMT -6
BEFORE:
"I said it last time I was here," says Beyonce without the hint of a smile. "If I'd concentrated on winning titles in the FCBA, I'd be a Hall of Famer. Just because I didn't, doesn't mean I can't beat these girls. I can. And I WILL."
"I don't know anything about what she did or why she did it," says Antje with a shake of the head. "I just know she's going to be in the ring with the most physical woman in the FCBA. And, that is NOT going to go well for her."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Run The World' you hear behind us, and that can only mean that the singer of that song, the lovely Beyonce Knowles, is on her way to ringside..."
McCarthy: "And, like I did the last time she was here, I'm going to back up Beyonce and say that she COULD have been a Hall of Famer if she WANTED to. Unless she was illegally DENIED entry by some jealous blonde. Like, you know, the Greatest Fighting Playmate of All Time!"
Tess: "Here we go..."
O'Dell: "Let's concentrate on the ring instead of having this debate for the thirtieth time..."
McCarthy: "I've been ROBBED of my rightful place in FCBA history, and you want to MUZZLE me?"
Cassie: "I'D like to muzzle you..."
McCarthy: "You LITTLE..."
O'Dell: "Beyonce into the ring and helped off with the robe to reveal a yellow number and a fit body clearly suited for the work tonight...and, that's 'Heads Will Roll' by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs and that means 'The Scandinavian Stunner', Antje Utgaard is about to join us..."
McCarthy: "Another of Weirdo's failed welterweights..."
Tess: "Utgaard, like most of the Front Street roster, under the microscope. And that goes doubly for the welters, who might not even have a division by the time we hit 2020."
O'Dell: "Antje into the ring and helped off with the robe. And the crowd, as usual, loving her in that stars and stripes bikini. Ladies are about ready to go. Time for some picks. Tess likes Antje. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Failed welterweight. Beyonce!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "Here we go. Utgaard setting up at range immediately. She's got the reach and she plans to use it, and this has two effects, it keeps the shorter woman at bay, and it also allows Antje to extend on her punches. Both things are bad for Beyonce, obviously..."
Cassie: "Absolutely, especially with the power Antje has."
O'Dell: "Utgaard getting into rhythm early. Also bad news for Beyonce. Younger woman getting that heavy Front Street jab on target, stopping the singer with it, then landing hard, sharp right hands as follow ons. Beyonce spending a lot of time covering up right now, Mac..."
McCarthy: "Beyonce's got to get this geometry right, because this isn't going to keep up for long..."
O'Dell: "Final thirty seconds of a one-way first. Utgaard in total control as Beyonce can't get to spots, can't get anything done offensively. GOOD combination Antje! She backs up the singer, forces her to cover up yet again. Five seconds left. Good right from Utgaard, and there's the bell. Antje. Wide."
Tess: "And, Utgaard is up 10-9."
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "Second begins with Beyonce beginning to solve some of this geometry. Singer angling in past Utgaard's jab, getting to middle distances where she can work. Beyonce athletic, moves very well, especially for a welter, and you're seeing that athleticism now..."
Cassie: "Utgaard also a very athletic welter, Jenny, and she's working the feet to restore the distance she wants."
O'Dell: "Antje giving a little ground, working that left hand, trying to enforce her terms. Able to do some of that now, but, Beyonce continues angling forward, looking to close where she can get off. Not a lot in it right now, as both fighters are getting some, but not enough of what they want..."
Tess: "A lot more movement and a lot less leather being tossed this stanza..."
O'Dell: "No question about that. Good right hand from Antje, but Beyonce steps in, lands a nice combination of her own. Singer finding the range much more in this round, but it hasn't been enough for her to do more than offset what Antje's done. Five seconds left. One last exchange and there's the bell. Draw."
McCarthy: "And, Utgaard still leads 20-19."
ROUND THREE:
O'Dell: "Third begins with Beyonce again angling forward and landing a solid combination. Singer forces Utgaard to cover up, then lands another quick flurry before stepping in and working some body. Antje tying up, but Beyonce lands a SHARP uppercut that has Utgaard covering up again..."
McCarthy: "THIS is the way to beat Weirdo's failed welters. Get PHYSICAL."
O'Dell: "Not sure that's a sound long-term strategy against a girl as big and strong as Antje, but Beyonce's managed to turn the fight with it for the moment. She's working the younger woman to head and body, keeping her on the defensive while staying right in her grill."
Tess: "No question, Utgaard isn't comfortable right now, and that's what Beyonce wants."
O'Dell: "Into the final twenty seconds of the third and it's the singer in control. She's got Antje thrown to the defensive. Utgaard covering up, trying to find ways to counter as Beyonce continues landing hard shot to the head and body on the inside. There's the bell. Big round, Beyonce."
Cassie: "And, we're even at 29."
ROUND FOUR:
O'Dell: "Beyonce again angling inside to work close. Utgaard looking to create space, but unable to do it. Instead, the singer is right in her grill. Utgaard tying up in there now and BEYONCE WITH AN UPPERCUT AND DOWN GOES ANTJE! Utgaard dropped to her back!"
McCarthy: "Failed welter! Failed welter!"
O'Dell: "Beyonce to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Six. Utgaard sits up. Seven. Eight. Antje to her feet. Ref gives her the mandatory and waives on Beyonce. Singer winging away as she steps to the younger woman, letting her have it with both hand, backing Utgaard into the ropes..."
Cassie: "Definitely wants the finisher now."
O'Dell: "Beyonce all OVER Antje and UTGAARD DROPS HER! Antje lands a short right hook and down goes Beyonce! Singer dropped to her back with fifteen seconds to go. Utgaard to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Six. Beyonce up at seven. Ref gives her the mandatory and the round going to end before he's finished! Wow! Beyonce gets the points 10-9, but...wow."
Tess: "Singer's up 39-38 after four, but this next round might tell the story."
ROUND FIVE:
O'Dell: "Fifth starts with both fighters looking a little wobbly. Ladies showing some caution in the early going, jabbing, moving a little, neither really pressing the issue right now. Utgaard making with that long left, and that's working for her at the moment. She's keeping Beyonce off with it."
Tess: "Singer a little buzzed, not able to close."
O'Dell: "That's changing now, as Beyonce begins angling in. Utgaard ties her up. Beyonce thumps some body in there as Antje tries to get a break. Beyonce shoves free, lands a short left hook before the fighters fall into another tie and the referee steps in to break."
Cassie: "Utgaard wants to get a little more aggressive now. She's letting Beyonce dictate in there."
O'Dell: "Is at the moment, as Beyonce's getting more done inside. We're down to ten seconds remaining in a slowly-paced fifth round. Antje had an early lead, but Beyonce's made up the stagger and pulled slightly ahead as we reach the bell. Close. Beyonce's round, though."
McCarthy: "And, Weirdo's Failed Welter is down 49-47 at the half."
ROUND SIX:
O'Dell: "Sixth begins with Beyonce looking to close again and EATING some hard leather from Antje! Utgaard setting the feet, getting the jab on, then following with right hands. Singer being held out on the end of the younger woman's punches at the moment, and that's not good news for Beyonce."
McCarthy: "Singer just has to get moving again. She's spending too much time flat footed."
O'Dell: "That's because Utgaard is stopping her with that long, heavy Front Street Jab, holding her in place for follow on right hands with a TON of power behind them. Beyonce BACKED UP with a hard flurry and Utgaard stepping forward. Antje has the older woman in reverse and aims to keep her there..."
Tess: "Antje as aggressive as we've seen her tonight."
O'Dell: "Definitely is. Has something going and plans to keep it gong. Lands ANOTHER hard flurry that forces Beyonce to back and cover. Utgaard walking her rival down now, THUMPING her with hard shot, tossing flurry after flurry at the singer who's just trying to ride this out. And, she'll do it. There's the bell. Shutout, Utgaard."
Cassie: "But, Beyonce still leads 58-57."
ROUND SEVEN:
O'Dell: "Into the seventh with Utgaard continuing to dial up the aggression. She's coming forward on Beyonce now, walking the singer down behind that heavy left jab. Older fighter being lined up right now, and that's not going well for her. She can't get out of reverse or get on to the offensive..."
Cassie: "And Antje's really landing those punches on the screws..."
O'Dell: "Definitely is. She's giving Beyonce a thumping at the moment, and there doesn't seem to be much the singer can do about it. SOLID right from Antje there. Beyonce covering up. And Utgaard splits the gloves with a jab and DROPS BEYONCE WITH A BOOMING RIGHT HAND!"
Tess: "Again, BFF, this might be a good time to do some singing..."
O'Dell: "Antje to a neutral corner. Beyonce flat on her back after that straight right. Referee's count at three. Four. Five. No movement at all from the singer. Six. Seven. Eight. Not going to happen. Nine. TEN! It's OVER! And your winner by KO7 is 'The Scandinavian Stunner', Antje Utgaard!"
McCarthy: "Lucky punch!"
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Antje Utgaard, and, Antje, very physical tonight..."
Antje (nodding): "Yeah. That's what she likes to do. She's got power and she likes to use it. Unfortunately for HER, there's nobody in the FCBA who's going to match physicals with ME. Nobody."
Tess: "Obviously a big win tonight, especially in light of the uncertain future..."
Antje: "Let me stop you right there. I'm not worried about that. I HOPE this stable doesn't get out of the welter business. But. If it does? I'm sure there are other stables that can use a six foot, 150 pound welter who's athletic enough to bend over backward and roll into a ball, you know?"
"I said it last time I was here," says Beyonce without the hint of a smile. "If I'd concentrated on winning titles in the FCBA, I'd be a Hall of Famer. Just because I didn't, doesn't mean I can't beat these girls. I can. And I WILL."
"I don't know anything about what she did or why she did it," says Antje with a shake of the head. "I just know she's going to be in the ring with the most physical woman in the FCBA. And, that is NOT going to go well for her."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Run The World' you hear behind us, and that can only mean that the singer of that song, the lovely Beyonce Knowles, is on her way to ringside..."
McCarthy: "And, like I did the last time she was here, I'm going to back up Beyonce and say that she COULD have been a Hall of Famer if she WANTED to. Unless she was illegally DENIED entry by some jealous blonde. Like, you know, the Greatest Fighting Playmate of All Time!"
Tess: "Here we go..."
O'Dell: "Let's concentrate on the ring instead of having this debate for the thirtieth time..."
McCarthy: "I've been ROBBED of my rightful place in FCBA history, and you want to MUZZLE me?"
Cassie: "I'D like to muzzle you..."
McCarthy: "You LITTLE..."
O'Dell: "Beyonce into the ring and helped off with the robe to reveal a yellow number and a fit body clearly suited for the work tonight...and, that's 'Heads Will Roll' by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs and that means 'The Scandinavian Stunner', Antje Utgaard is about to join us..."
McCarthy: "Another of Weirdo's failed welterweights..."
Tess: "Utgaard, like most of the Front Street roster, under the microscope. And that goes doubly for the welters, who might not even have a division by the time we hit 2020."
O'Dell: "Antje into the ring and helped off with the robe. And the crowd, as usual, loving her in that stars and stripes bikini. Ladies are about ready to go. Time for some picks. Tess likes Antje. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Failed welterweight. Beyonce!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "Here we go. Utgaard setting up at range immediately. She's got the reach and she plans to use it, and this has two effects, it keeps the shorter woman at bay, and it also allows Antje to extend on her punches. Both things are bad for Beyonce, obviously..."
Cassie: "Absolutely, especially with the power Antje has."
O'Dell: "Utgaard getting into rhythm early. Also bad news for Beyonce. Younger woman getting that heavy Front Street jab on target, stopping the singer with it, then landing hard, sharp right hands as follow ons. Beyonce spending a lot of time covering up right now, Mac..."
McCarthy: "Beyonce's got to get this geometry right, because this isn't going to keep up for long..."
O'Dell: "Final thirty seconds of a one-way first. Utgaard in total control as Beyonce can't get to spots, can't get anything done offensively. GOOD combination Antje! She backs up the singer, forces her to cover up yet again. Five seconds left. Good right from Utgaard, and there's the bell. Antje. Wide."
Tess: "And, Utgaard is up 10-9."
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "Second begins with Beyonce beginning to solve some of this geometry. Singer angling in past Utgaard's jab, getting to middle distances where she can work. Beyonce athletic, moves very well, especially for a welter, and you're seeing that athleticism now..."
Cassie: "Utgaard also a very athletic welter, Jenny, and she's working the feet to restore the distance she wants."
O'Dell: "Antje giving a little ground, working that left hand, trying to enforce her terms. Able to do some of that now, but, Beyonce continues angling forward, looking to close where she can get off. Not a lot in it right now, as both fighters are getting some, but not enough of what they want..."
Tess: "A lot more movement and a lot less leather being tossed this stanza..."
O'Dell: "No question about that. Good right hand from Antje, but Beyonce steps in, lands a nice combination of her own. Singer finding the range much more in this round, but it hasn't been enough for her to do more than offset what Antje's done. Five seconds left. One last exchange and there's the bell. Draw."
McCarthy: "And, Utgaard still leads 20-19."
ROUND THREE:
O'Dell: "Third begins with Beyonce again angling forward and landing a solid combination. Singer forces Utgaard to cover up, then lands another quick flurry before stepping in and working some body. Antje tying up, but Beyonce lands a SHARP uppercut that has Utgaard covering up again..."
McCarthy: "THIS is the way to beat Weirdo's failed welters. Get PHYSICAL."
O'Dell: "Not sure that's a sound long-term strategy against a girl as big and strong as Antje, but Beyonce's managed to turn the fight with it for the moment. She's working the younger woman to head and body, keeping her on the defensive while staying right in her grill."
Tess: "No question, Utgaard isn't comfortable right now, and that's what Beyonce wants."
O'Dell: "Into the final twenty seconds of the third and it's the singer in control. She's got Antje thrown to the defensive. Utgaard covering up, trying to find ways to counter as Beyonce continues landing hard shot to the head and body on the inside. There's the bell. Big round, Beyonce."
Cassie: "And, we're even at 29."
ROUND FOUR:
O'Dell: "Beyonce again angling inside to work close. Utgaard looking to create space, but unable to do it. Instead, the singer is right in her grill. Utgaard tying up in there now and BEYONCE WITH AN UPPERCUT AND DOWN GOES ANTJE! Utgaard dropped to her back!"
McCarthy: "Failed welter! Failed welter!"
O'Dell: "Beyonce to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Six. Utgaard sits up. Seven. Eight. Antje to her feet. Ref gives her the mandatory and waives on Beyonce. Singer winging away as she steps to the younger woman, letting her have it with both hand, backing Utgaard into the ropes..."
Cassie: "Definitely wants the finisher now."
O'Dell: "Beyonce all OVER Antje and UTGAARD DROPS HER! Antje lands a short right hook and down goes Beyonce! Singer dropped to her back with fifteen seconds to go. Utgaard to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Six. Beyonce up at seven. Ref gives her the mandatory and the round going to end before he's finished! Wow! Beyonce gets the points 10-9, but...wow."
Tess: "Singer's up 39-38 after four, but this next round might tell the story."
ROUND FIVE:
O'Dell: "Fifth starts with both fighters looking a little wobbly. Ladies showing some caution in the early going, jabbing, moving a little, neither really pressing the issue right now. Utgaard making with that long left, and that's working for her at the moment. She's keeping Beyonce off with it."
Tess: "Singer a little buzzed, not able to close."
O'Dell: "That's changing now, as Beyonce begins angling in. Utgaard ties her up. Beyonce thumps some body in there as Antje tries to get a break. Beyonce shoves free, lands a short left hook before the fighters fall into another tie and the referee steps in to break."
Cassie: "Utgaard wants to get a little more aggressive now. She's letting Beyonce dictate in there."
O'Dell: "Is at the moment, as Beyonce's getting more done inside. We're down to ten seconds remaining in a slowly-paced fifth round. Antje had an early lead, but Beyonce's made up the stagger and pulled slightly ahead as we reach the bell. Close. Beyonce's round, though."
McCarthy: "And, Weirdo's Failed Welter is down 49-47 at the half."
ROUND SIX:
O'Dell: "Sixth begins with Beyonce looking to close again and EATING some hard leather from Antje! Utgaard setting the feet, getting the jab on, then following with right hands. Singer being held out on the end of the younger woman's punches at the moment, and that's not good news for Beyonce."
McCarthy: "Singer just has to get moving again. She's spending too much time flat footed."
O'Dell: "That's because Utgaard is stopping her with that long, heavy Front Street Jab, holding her in place for follow on right hands with a TON of power behind them. Beyonce BACKED UP with a hard flurry and Utgaard stepping forward. Antje has the older woman in reverse and aims to keep her there..."
Tess: "Antje as aggressive as we've seen her tonight."
O'Dell: "Definitely is. Has something going and plans to keep it gong. Lands ANOTHER hard flurry that forces Beyonce to back and cover. Utgaard walking her rival down now, THUMPING her with hard shot, tossing flurry after flurry at the singer who's just trying to ride this out. And, she'll do it. There's the bell. Shutout, Utgaard."
Cassie: "But, Beyonce still leads 58-57."
ROUND SEVEN:
O'Dell: "Into the seventh with Utgaard continuing to dial up the aggression. She's coming forward on Beyonce now, walking the singer down behind that heavy left jab. Older fighter being lined up right now, and that's not going well for her. She can't get out of reverse or get on to the offensive..."
Cassie: "And Antje's really landing those punches on the screws..."
O'Dell: "Definitely is. She's giving Beyonce a thumping at the moment, and there doesn't seem to be much the singer can do about it. SOLID right from Antje there. Beyonce covering up. And Utgaard splits the gloves with a jab and DROPS BEYONCE WITH A BOOMING RIGHT HAND!"
Tess: "Again, BFF, this might be a good time to do some singing..."
O'Dell: "Antje to a neutral corner. Beyonce flat on her back after that straight right. Referee's count at three. Four. Five. No movement at all from the singer. Six. Seven. Eight. Not going to happen. Nine. TEN! It's OVER! And your winner by KO7 is 'The Scandinavian Stunner', Antje Utgaard!"
McCarthy: "Lucky punch!"
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Antje Utgaard, and, Antje, very physical tonight..."
Antje (nodding): "Yeah. That's what she likes to do. She's got power and she likes to use it. Unfortunately for HER, there's nobody in the FCBA who's going to match physicals with ME. Nobody."
Tess: "Obviously a big win tonight, especially in light of the uncertain future..."
Antje: "Let me stop you right there. I'm not worried about that. I HOPE this stable doesn't get out of the welter business. But. If it does? I'm sure there are other stables that can use a six foot, 150 pound welter who's athletic enough to bend over backward and roll into a ball, you know?"