Post by President Jenny McCarthy on Nov 2, 2018 12:38:52 GMT -6
Hastily called press conference by Sceej Boxing ...
As acting President of Sceej Boxing, I Jenny McCarthy have taken on the tremendous responsibility of righting a ship that has been on the wrong track. And after almost an entire day of thought, I have decided to get back to the glory days, we need to go back to the glory days! We are going "old school" like when this boxing team was founded ten years ago - we were the "Chin Checkers" and we were the terror of the FCBA!
So without further ado, I am hereby releasing Olivia Munn and Taylor Hill from their contracts with Sceej Boxing. Both are now free agents.
We will go with the classic lineup ... Adrienne "Amazon" Palicki at lightweight ... Big Bad Gena Lee Nolin at welterweight. I myself will be stepping down as head trainer and we are pleased to announce the great Scrubby McGee has come out of retirement at the back of Clancy's Bar to act as head trainer! Carrie Prejean will continue to carry buckets - she will also be available for fights at lightweight and welterweight if anyone feels the need for a confidence builder.
Murmurs from press ... "Did she really just release Taylor Hill? That girl is a real comer at welterweight."
"What the hell is she doing?"
"Sceej can't know about this!"
Question from reporter from "Brunette" Magazine: "Why is Munn being released? Is it because you to have had issues in the past?"
Jenny: "Nope ... I respect Olivia, she's a genuine bad ass ... just not a good fit here."
Question from FCBA Enquirer: "Why is Hill going? She's young, she just beat Theron and gave Righetti a rough fight, she's ranked 10th, what if the logic???"
Jenny: "Well, you cannot let logic get in the way of smart decisions! The Sceej model has always been one fighter at each weight - no rivalries in stable. And we have Big Bad Gena Lee, the greatest knockout artist in FCBA history!"
FCBA Enquirer: "But Nolin's like 46 years old?!!"
Jenny: "Age ain't nothing but a number!"
Tess Valmore, Tractorpull: "You mentioned one fighter at each weight, now I know Sceej Boxing has never fielded a flyweight but doesn't cutting Munn leave you without a bantam?"
Jenny: "Funny you should ask, girlfriend! We actually DO have a bantam ... and you're looking at her!!! That's right! Jenny Mac is comin' back! And kicking down the door of your so-called Hall of Fame! You see, Walmart, you miscalculated in your arithmetic when you said I'd need to win 28 fights in a row and at the rate of five a year it would take me til I am 53! What if I win ten fights a year? Then it would only take ... uhm ... errrr ... (carry the five?) ... well, a lot shorter time!!! Plus, there is no current bantam who can deal with the speed and skill and athleticism and violence I bring! Sooooooo ...."
(and piped in music)
"Oh the line forms .... on the right babe ... now that Mac issssssssssssssssssssssss back in town! Look out ol' Mac is back!!!!"
