6. Brenda Song vs. Kristen Stewart
Jan 31, 2018 19:34:59 GMT -6
The Dollhouse and Emma Roberts like this
Post by Results: Lookout! Words: Wiz on Jan 31, 2018 19:34:59 GMT -6
BEFORE:
"I've been in a little slump," says Brenda with a shake of the head. "And, it's getting a LOT old. So, tonight's the night that comes to an end."
"She may not have gotten results lately," says Kristen. "But, don't let that fool you. She's as good as anyone in this division, or she wouldn't have beaten Kruek, Williams, Panettiere, and Hudgens. She's a challenge for anyone. But. I'm up to it."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Hungarian Rhapsody #2 by Liszt' and that can only mean that Brenda Song of the Bazz Fight Club is coming to the ring..."
Tess: "BFF, remember the time Brenda came down here and nailed Mac in the face with a pudding-filled balloon?"
Cassie: "Fondly, BFF. Fondly."
McCarthy: "Well, there had BETTER not be any nonsense tonight! I have my attorney on SPEED DIAL..."
Tess: "Which won't stop him from pressing the 'straight to voicemail' button..."
McCarthy: "Shut UP, Walmart!"
O'Dell: "Drink up, boys, as Brenda climbs into the ring and is helped off with the robe to reveal that black number the crowd likes..."
Tess: "Song looks to be in incredible shape as always. No surprise for a Bazz girl..."
Cassie: "You've run the hill with me, BFF. How is it?"
Tess: "Absolute torture."
O'Dell: "And, that's 'Helter Skelter' by the Beatles, and here comes the FCBA's biggest Beatles fan, 'The Five-Tool Player', Kristen Stewart..."
McCarthy: "You know, this girl is starting to GROW on me, since Walmart hates her..."
Tess: "I don't HATE her..."
McCarthy: "Which is JUST what someone who HATES someone WOULD say..."
Cassie: "Don't try to follow that 'logic', BFF. You'll need a bottle of aspirin for the headache..."
O'Dell: "IF we could concentrate on the ring. Stewart climbing in to be helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve. She's wearing that lime green number we've seen before..."
McCarthy: "And, she looks cute in it..."
Cassie: "Truck, cue up one of the MANY references Mac has made to Kristen having the body of a teen boy..."
McCarthy: "Shut UP, Scabbo!"
O'Dell (sighing): "And, the ladies are about ready. Time for some picks. Tess likes Kristen. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Like I said, this kid is growing on me. Stewart."
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "You KNOW I'm going with Brenda!"
O'Dell: "And, there's the bell. Feeling out process early, as Kristen, as usual, wants to use the long left hand to set up her rights, box at range. Brenda, who's giving up reach, all about the angles. She has that unorthodox style that's hard to deal with and makes her hard to find..."
Cassie: "And, you're seeing that now. Stewart one of the most accurate fighters in the FCBA, but, she's having trouble getting the left on."
O'Dell: "Meanwhile, Song having trouble finding holes in Stewart's defenses. Kristen able to keep her at bay with that left hand, at least for the moment. Song angling, moving the feet, moving the head and hands. Stewart wants to locate, follow on, but not having much success doing that."
McCarthy: "Lot of feints and punches being blocked and missed, but not much landing."
O'Dell: "Definitely all about recon right now. Fighters clearly have respect for one another, and they're showing it right now. Song dipping, slipping forward, landing a combination. Stewart firing back with one of her own and there's the bell. Absolutely nothing in it in the first. Even round."
Tess: "And, we're even at 10 after one."
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "War of movement continues in the second. Both of these fighters have good feet, and you're seeing that. K-Stew always very athletic, but Brenda's no slouch in that department, either. Song again dips, slips forward, gets off a nice combination. Stewart answers as Brenda slips away."
Cassie: "Brenda's so slick. She's planning three or four moves ahead all the time."
O'Dell: "Stewart landing that left a bit more now. She's still not able to follow on much from range, because Brenda's defenses are so strong, but, at least she's scoring with the jab. Song again dipping forward, works a little body. Stewart ties her up, forces a break, and they're back at range."
Tess: "I like Brenda's strategy here. Very patient. Looking for her opportunities and then making the best of them."
O'Dell: "Twenty seconds left in the first. Stewart jabbing, Song moving the feet, angling, slips forward, again digs to the breadbasket. Stewart ties up and gets another break from the referee. Ten seconds to go, and Kristen going to jab this one away. There's the bell. Close, but K-Stew."
McCarthy: "20-19 Stewart."
ROUND THREE:
O'Dell: "Third and we're seeing the same terms. Both fighters finding things they like, and they're sticking with them. Song slipping, dipping, being all hard to find. Stewart determined to find with that long left hand. When she does, she's able to follow and score points in combination..."
Cassie: "And, when she can't, Brenda gets to HER spots and scores in combination."
O'Dell: "She does, indeed, and the result is an interesting, two-way tactical fight that's seen very little in it so far. Song uses that shoulder very, very well, Mac. Moves the head, raises it, deflects punches with it. Extremely slick stuff that not many fighters, even at the FCBA level, do as well as Brenda does..."
McCarthy: "If you expect ME to say good things about a girl who hit me IN THE FACE with a pudding BOMB..."
Tess: "I'd almost forgotten about that. Truck, roll that tape between rounds..."
McCarthy: "DON'T YOU DARE!"
O'Dell (sighing): "Thank goodness this is the last fight of the evening, because I hear a stiff DRINK or five calling my name. Ten seconds left in a very close third round. Song slipping a jab, landing a nice combination, slipping away and there's the bell. Another close round. This one to Brenda."
Cassie: "And, she's tied it up at 29."
ROUND FOUR:
O'Dell: "Song a bit more aggressive in the early portion of this stanza. She believes she's found a crack in Stewart's defenses, and she's exploiting, slipping past the jab, getting off and landing some hard shot. Kristen forced to cover up and now forced to do so again! Song throwing Stewart onto the defensive..."
Cassie: "Brenda throws punches at you from places where punches shouldn't come. All part of that style of hers. And, it's hard to deal with."
O'Dell: "K-Stew having problems dealing with it, that's for sure. Stewart backed up, now, as Brenda lands another sharp combination. Crowd getting into this thing as Song's now getting rolling, forcing another cover up from Kristen, who's definitely out of sorts at the moment. Has no idea where the fire is going to come from next."
Tess: "This is what comes of being babied."
O'Dell: "Coming down the stretch in the fourth. Song has taken control and she lands ANOTHER hard combination that backs Kristen up. Stewart giving some more ground, doing some circling now, trying to get some space and time, but Brenda not having it, lands one more flurry at the bell. Song. Wide."
McCarthy: "And, the little weasel's up 39-38 after four."
ROUND FIVE:
O'Dell: "Song pressing the action again as we start the fifth. Stewart using a drop step now, creating a bit of extra space for her to get the jab on, and it's having an effect. She's slowing Brenda down, keeping her from getting her swarm on, as she was able to do in the last round."
Tess: "But, Song's still getting to her spots and getting off. Just not as frequently."
O'Dell: "Absolutely is and there's a GOOD flurry from Brenda and a SHARP right in response from Kristen! That might have been Stewart's best punch of the fight. But, it didn't short circuit her rival's aggression. Brenda still coming and coming hard. She's using a lot of energy here, but..."
Cassie: "Being a BAZZ girl, that's not a problem. Brenda can go fifteen rounds at full power any day of the week."
O'Dell: "Final half minute of the fifth. Song slipping, dipping landing a nice combination. Stewart another HARD right hand in counter. Kristen circles back, landing the jab. Keeping Brenda at bay as we head for the bell. Ten seconds remaining. Good combination from Stewart and there's the bell. Nothing in it. Even again."
McCarthy: "Two even rounds in the same fight. Don't see that every day. 49-48 Song at the half."
ROUND SIX:
O'Dell: "Sixth round begins and the pattern is set. It's Song looking to force the action and Stewart looking to control the shorter woman with that left hand. Kristen doubling up on the jab now. That double tap working to slow Song a bit...when Kristen's able to land it. When she can't, it's Brenda hitting her spots..."
Cassie: "And hitting STEWART with solid shot."
O'Dell: "No question that Brenda's doing something that's very difficult to do. She's matching Kristen's accuracy, landing as high a percentage of shot as Stewart, who's among the most accurate punchers in the FCBA. Song lands a nice combination to the body and head there..."
Tess: "Set that up VERY very well."
O'Dell: "Twenty seconds left in the round. Stewart and nice combination there! She double-tapped the jab and landed a solid right and then does it again! Song backed up for the first time all night. Five seconds to go. One last flurry and there's the bell. Close yet again. Stewart."
McCarthy: "And, we're even at 58 after six."
ROUND SEVEN:
O'Dell: "An excellent, even fight through six, and neither fighter looking to change up much into the seventh. Song with that unorthodox style, dipping forward, slipping punches, landing a nice three-punch combination. Stewart again counters with a hard right hand, before using the drop step to circle away..."
McCarthy: "Stewart needs to get more aggressive here. She's letting Song dictate too much."
O'Dell: "Heading for the half way point of the round. Song again slips past Stewart's defenses, gets off in combination. Stewart circles away, working that left. Brenda again makes with the pressure and GETS DROPPED! Oh, Stewart caught her with a straight right hand and down goes Brenda!"
Cassie: "Get UP! Get UP!"
O'Dell: "Brenda dropped to her back. Stewart quickly to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Song looking up at the referee. Six. Brenda rolls to her belly. Seven. Song pushing to hands and knees at eight. Nine. TEN! Song to her feet, but it's too late! Fails to beat the count by a second or so and it's OVER! And your winner by KO7 is 'The Five-Tool Player', Kristen Stewart!"
Tess: "Very close. Almost beat it."
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Kristen Stewart, and, Kristen..."
Kristen: "Haters gonna hate, Tess. And, that's all I've got to say tonight. Haters gonna hate."
"I've been in a little slump," says Brenda with a shake of the head. "And, it's getting a LOT old. So, tonight's the night that comes to an end."
"She may not have gotten results lately," says Kristen. "But, don't let that fool you. She's as good as anyone in this division, or she wouldn't have beaten Kruek, Williams, Panettiere, and Hudgens. She's a challenge for anyone. But. I'm up to it."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Hungarian Rhapsody #2 by Liszt' and that can only mean that Brenda Song of the Bazz Fight Club is coming to the ring..."
Tess: "BFF, remember the time Brenda came down here and nailed Mac in the face with a pudding-filled balloon?"
Cassie: "Fondly, BFF. Fondly."
McCarthy: "Well, there had BETTER not be any nonsense tonight! I have my attorney on SPEED DIAL..."
Tess: "Which won't stop him from pressing the 'straight to voicemail' button..."
McCarthy: "Shut UP, Walmart!"
O'Dell: "Drink up, boys, as Brenda climbs into the ring and is helped off with the robe to reveal that black number the crowd likes..."
Tess: "Song looks to be in incredible shape as always. No surprise for a Bazz girl..."
Cassie: "You've run the hill with me, BFF. How is it?"
Tess: "Absolute torture."
O'Dell: "And, that's 'Helter Skelter' by the Beatles, and here comes the FCBA's biggest Beatles fan, 'The Five-Tool Player', Kristen Stewart..."
McCarthy: "You know, this girl is starting to GROW on me, since Walmart hates her..."
Tess: "I don't HATE her..."
McCarthy: "Which is JUST what someone who HATES someone WOULD say..."
Cassie: "Don't try to follow that 'logic', BFF. You'll need a bottle of aspirin for the headache..."
O'Dell: "IF we could concentrate on the ring. Stewart climbing in to be helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve. She's wearing that lime green number we've seen before..."
McCarthy: "And, she looks cute in it..."
Cassie: "Truck, cue up one of the MANY references Mac has made to Kristen having the body of a teen boy..."
McCarthy: "Shut UP, Scabbo!"
O'Dell (sighing): "And, the ladies are about ready. Time for some picks. Tess likes Kristen. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Like I said, this kid is growing on me. Stewart."
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "You KNOW I'm going with Brenda!"
O'Dell: "And, there's the bell. Feeling out process early, as Kristen, as usual, wants to use the long left hand to set up her rights, box at range. Brenda, who's giving up reach, all about the angles. She has that unorthodox style that's hard to deal with and makes her hard to find..."
Cassie: "And, you're seeing that now. Stewart one of the most accurate fighters in the FCBA, but, she's having trouble getting the left on."
O'Dell: "Meanwhile, Song having trouble finding holes in Stewart's defenses. Kristen able to keep her at bay with that left hand, at least for the moment. Song angling, moving the feet, moving the head and hands. Stewart wants to locate, follow on, but not having much success doing that."
McCarthy: "Lot of feints and punches being blocked and missed, but not much landing."
O'Dell: "Definitely all about recon right now. Fighters clearly have respect for one another, and they're showing it right now. Song dipping, slipping forward, landing a combination. Stewart firing back with one of her own and there's the bell. Absolutely nothing in it in the first. Even round."
Tess: "And, we're even at 10 after one."
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "War of movement continues in the second. Both of these fighters have good feet, and you're seeing that. K-Stew always very athletic, but Brenda's no slouch in that department, either. Song again dips, slips forward, gets off a nice combination. Stewart answers as Brenda slips away."
Cassie: "Brenda's so slick. She's planning three or four moves ahead all the time."
O'Dell: "Stewart landing that left a bit more now. She's still not able to follow on much from range, because Brenda's defenses are so strong, but, at least she's scoring with the jab. Song again dipping forward, works a little body. Stewart ties her up, forces a break, and they're back at range."
Tess: "I like Brenda's strategy here. Very patient. Looking for her opportunities and then making the best of them."
O'Dell: "Twenty seconds left in the first. Stewart jabbing, Song moving the feet, angling, slips forward, again digs to the breadbasket. Stewart ties up and gets another break from the referee. Ten seconds to go, and Kristen going to jab this one away. There's the bell. Close, but K-Stew."
McCarthy: "20-19 Stewart."
ROUND THREE:
O'Dell: "Third and we're seeing the same terms. Both fighters finding things they like, and they're sticking with them. Song slipping, dipping, being all hard to find. Stewart determined to find with that long left hand. When she does, she's able to follow and score points in combination..."
Cassie: "And, when she can't, Brenda gets to HER spots and scores in combination."
O'Dell: "She does, indeed, and the result is an interesting, two-way tactical fight that's seen very little in it so far. Song uses that shoulder very, very well, Mac. Moves the head, raises it, deflects punches with it. Extremely slick stuff that not many fighters, even at the FCBA level, do as well as Brenda does..."
McCarthy: "If you expect ME to say good things about a girl who hit me IN THE FACE with a pudding BOMB..."
Tess: "I'd almost forgotten about that. Truck, roll that tape between rounds..."
McCarthy: "DON'T YOU DARE!"
O'Dell (sighing): "Thank goodness this is the last fight of the evening, because I hear a stiff DRINK or five calling my name. Ten seconds left in a very close third round. Song slipping a jab, landing a nice combination, slipping away and there's the bell. Another close round. This one to Brenda."
Cassie: "And, she's tied it up at 29."
ROUND FOUR:
O'Dell: "Song a bit more aggressive in the early portion of this stanza. She believes she's found a crack in Stewart's defenses, and she's exploiting, slipping past the jab, getting off and landing some hard shot. Kristen forced to cover up and now forced to do so again! Song throwing Stewart onto the defensive..."
Cassie: "Brenda throws punches at you from places where punches shouldn't come. All part of that style of hers. And, it's hard to deal with."
O'Dell: "K-Stew having problems dealing with it, that's for sure. Stewart backed up, now, as Brenda lands another sharp combination. Crowd getting into this thing as Song's now getting rolling, forcing another cover up from Kristen, who's definitely out of sorts at the moment. Has no idea where the fire is going to come from next."
Tess: "This is what comes of being babied."
O'Dell: "Coming down the stretch in the fourth. Song has taken control and she lands ANOTHER hard combination that backs Kristen up. Stewart giving some more ground, doing some circling now, trying to get some space and time, but Brenda not having it, lands one more flurry at the bell. Song. Wide."
McCarthy: "And, the little weasel's up 39-38 after four."
ROUND FIVE:
O'Dell: "Song pressing the action again as we start the fifth. Stewart using a drop step now, creating a bit of extra space for her to get the jab on, and it's having an effect. She's slowing Brenda down, keeping her from getting her swarm on, as she was able to do in the last round."
Tess: "But, Song's still getting to her spots and getting off. Just not as frequently."
O'Dell: "Absolutely is and there's a GOOD flurry from Brenda and a SHARP right in response from Kristen! That might have been Stewart's best punch of the fight. But, it didn't short circuit her rival's aggression. Brenda still coming and coming hard. She's using a lot of energy here, but..."
Cassie: "Being a BAZZ girl, that's not a problem. Brenda can go fifteen rounds at full power any day of the week."
O'Dell: "Final half minute of the fifth. Song slipping, dipping landing a nice combination. Stewart another HARD right hand in counter. Kristen circles back, landing the jab. Keeping Brenda at bay as we head for the bell. Ten seconds remaining. Good combination from Stewart and there's the bell. Nothing in it. Even again."
McCarthy: "Two even rounds in the same fight. Don't see that every day. 49-48 Song at the half."
ROUND SIX:
O'Dell: "Sixth round begins and the pattern is set. It's Song looking to force the action and Stewart looking to control the shorter woman with that left hand. Kristen doubling up on the jab now. That double tap working to slow Song a bit...when Kristen's able to land it. When she can't, it's Brenda hitting her spots..."
Cassie: "And hitting STEWART with solid shot."
O'Dell: "No question that Brenda's doing something that's very difficult to do. She's matching Kristen's accuracy, landing as high a percentage of shot as Stewart, who's among the most accurate punchers in the FCBA. Song lands a nice combination to the body and head there..."
Tess: "Set that up VERY very well."
O'Dell: "Twenty seconds left in the round. Stewart and nice combination there! She double-tapped the jab and landed a solid right and then does it again! Song backed up for the first time all night. Five seconds to go. One last flurry and there's the bell. Close yet again. Stewart."
McCarthy: "And, we're even at 58 after six."
ROUND SEVEN:
O'Dell: "An excellent, even fight through six, and neither fighter looking to change up much into the seventh. Song with that unorthodox style, dipping forward, slipping punches, landing a nice three-punch combination. Stewart again counters with a hard right hand, before using the drop step to circle away..."
McCarthy: "Stewart needs to get more aggressive here. She's letting Song dictate too much."
O'Dell: "Heading for the half way point of the round. Song again slips past Stewart's defenses, gets off in combination. Stewart circles away, working that left. Brenda again makes with the pressure and GETS DROPPED! Oh, Stewart caught her with a straight right hand and down goes Brenda!"
Cassie: "Get UP! Get UP!"
O'Dell: "Brenda dropped to her back. Stewart quickly to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Song looking up at the referee. Six. Brenda rolls to her belly. Seven. Song pushing to hands and knees at eight. Nine. TEN! Song to her feet, but it's too late! Fails to beat the count by a second or so and it's OVER! And your winner by KO7 is 'The Five-Tool Player', Kristen Stewart!"
Tess: "Very close. Almost beat it."
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Kristen Stewart, and, Kristen..."
Kristen: "Haters gonna hate, Tess. And, that's all I've got to say tonight. Haters gonna hate."