Post by Results: Lookout! Words: Wiz on Mar 31, 2017 20:36:05 GMT -6
BEFORE:
"No," says Gwyneth with a shake of the head, "I never figured I'd get back here. I mean, I beat Kesha and Perry and they HAD to bring me back for Arterton, but, as soon as she got lucky, the phone stopped ringing. So. Yeah. I'm surprised, especially with Perry coming off a loss. And, tonight, her losing streak's about to reach two."
"Oh, I remember the first fight," says a hard-eyed Katy. "Lots of people wrote me off after that. And, all I did was go win the title. But. I've got some unfinished business with Paltrow. And, tonight, it gets finished."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'This Woman's Work', and that means that the singer of this version of the song, the lovely Gwyneth Paltrow, is on her way to ringside."
McCarthy: "And, I say again, she'd better not EYE me. Just because I'm retired from the FCBA doesn't mean I won't get up out of this seat and smack a bytch upside her head!"
O'Dell: "Paltrow down the aisle and into the ring. Helped off with the robe to reveal that deep blue number we've seen before..."
McCarthy: "And, she still looks like a q-tip! How is it we never had a fight between her and Park? Probably because if they'd have stood sideways, nobody in the crowd would have been able to SEE anything!"
Tess: "Paltrow, of course, caused some problems for Front Street back a few years ago, beating Kesha and then putting a KO1 on Katy Perry..."
O'Dell: "And, speaking of Ms. Perry, that's 'California Gurls' you hear pounding through the arena, and here comes 'The Santa Barbara Slugger' herself..."
Cassie: "And, as Gwyneth pointed out in the pre-fight, Katy coming off a great fight against Strahovski that Yvonne pulled out. Perry's been in the title picture for three years now, and she's definitely looking for another shot at the straps. If that's going to happen any time soon, she needs a win tonight."
O'Dell: "No doubt about that. Perry into the ring and helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve. She's wearing that red number we've seen before, and the crowd loves it. Ladies about ready. Time for some picks. Tess favors Katy. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Perry's overrated like all the Dancing Hookers, but even she can beat this q-tip!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "And, here we go. And, just like our last fight, nobody wasting any time in this one. Perry stepping right to Paltrow and Gwyneth not taking a step back and we've got a FIREFIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING! Blonde and brunette banging away at one another and this thing isn't 30 seconds old!"
Tess: "Not surprised that this is Perry's game. She's got something to prove tonight."
O'Dell: "And, Paltrow has something to prove, too, that the first time wasn't some fluke, and that's just what she's trying to do standing toe-to-toe with the brunette. Again, this isn't the Skinny Gwynny of earlier years, this is the more solid, rock-hard abs Paltrow of the Marvel films, and there's quite the difference..."
McCarthy: "She's STILL a q-tip!"
O'Dell: "Coming down the stretch in an action-packed first. Ladies hammering away. Nobody getting sloppy, mind. Good defense being played. But both fighters are committing on everything, really getting the power behind the punches. Ten seconds to go. Good exchange there and that's the bell. Close. Perry."
Cassie: "And, check out the staredown going on right now! No love lost between these two!"
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "Second begins as the first ended. Fighters right back at one another, letting the hands go, definitely showing plenty of bad intentions. GOOD right hand from Paltrow backed Perry up a step, but Katy right back in her grill, digging some body now, really testing those abs..."
Cassie: "And, as you pointed out, Jenny, there was a time when investing in the body was a chalk thing to do against Paltrow. Now, it takes a lot more investment."
O'Dell: "Perry down and back up. Paltrow ringing up Katy with another solid right, but Perry bangs right back. She's thumping hooks to the ribs, and using the straight stuff upstairs. Paltrow working more to the head, doing just enough downstairs to keep Katy honest. ANOTHER good right hand from Paltrow..."
Tess: "These shots remind me of the one she stopped Perry with the last time..."
O'Dell: "OH, A HUGE RIGHT HAND AND DOWN GOES PALTROW! Perry absolutely poleaxed Gwyneth with a BOOMING straight right and she ragdolls to her back!"
Cassie (singing): "Turn out the liiiiggghhhhttsss. The party's oooovvvveerrrrrr...."
O'Dell: "Perry to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Paltrow not moving at all..."
McCarthy: "He can count all day. Q-tip is OUT."
O'Dell: "Eight. Nine. TEN! And it's OVER! And your winner by KO2 in one-punch fashion is 'The Santa Barbara Slugger', Katy Perry!"
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Katy Perry, and, Katy, it was clear your plan was to take her out of there as quickly as you could..."
Katy: "Like I said, I had unfinished business. And, I came in here for the singular purpose of finishing it. I wasn't here to win a decision. I was here to knock her flat on her a**."
Tess: "What's next for you?"
Katy: "We'll just have to see what opportunities present themselves. Just like always, I'm up for anything."
"No," says Gwyneth with a shake of the head, "I never figured I'd get back here. I mean, I beat Kesha and Perry and they HAD to bring me back for Arterton, but, as soon as she got lucky, the phone stopped ringing. So. Yeah. I'm surprised, especially with Perry coming off a loss. And, tonight, her losing streak's about to reach two."
"Oh, I remember the first fight," says a hard-eyed Katy. "Lots of people wrote me off after that. And, all I did was go win the title. But. I've got some unfinished business with Paltrow. And, tonight, it gets finished."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'This Woman's Work', and that means that the singer of this version of the song, the lovely Gwyneth Paltrow, is on her way to ringside."
McCarthy: "And, I say again, she'd better not EYE me. Just because I'm retired from the FCBA doesn't mean I won't get up out of this seat and smack a bytch upside her head!"
O'Dell: "Paltrow down the aisle and into the ring. Helped off with the robe to reveal that deep blue number we've seen before..."
McCarthy: "And, she still looks like a q-tip! How is it we never had a fight between her and Park? Probably because if they'd have stood sideways, nobody in the crowd would have been able to SEE anything!"
Tess: "Paltrow, of course, caused some problems for Front Street back a few years ago, beating Kesha and then putting a KO1 on Katy Perry..."
O'Dell: "And, speaking of Ms. Perry, that's 'California Gurls' you hear pounding through the arena, and here comes 'The Santa Barbara Slugger' herself..."
Cassie: "And, as Gwyneth pointed out in the pre-fight, Katy coming off a great fight against Strahovski that Yvonne pulled out. Perry's been in the title picture for three years now, and she's definitely looking for another shot at the straps. If that's going to happen any time soon, she needs a win tonight."
O'Dell: "No doubt about that. Perry into the ring and helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve. She's wearing that red number we've seen before, and the crowd loves it. Ladies about ready. Time for some picks. Tess favors Katy. Mac?"
McCarthy: "Perry's overrated like all the Dancing Hookers, but even she can beat this q-tip!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "And, here we go. And, just like our last fight, nobody wasting any time in this one. Perry stepping right to Paltrow and Gwyneth not taking a step back and we've got a FIREFIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING! Blonde and brunette banging away at one another and this thing isn't 30 seconds old!"
Tess: "Not surprised that this is Perry's game. She's got something to prove tonight."
O'Dell: "And, Paltrow has something to prove, too, that the first time wasn't some fluke, and that's just what she's trying to do standing toe-to-toe with the brunette. Again, this isn't the Skinny Gwynny of earlier years, this is the more solid, rock-hard abs Paltrow of the Marvel films, and there's quite the difference..."
McCarthy: "She's STILL a q-tip!"
O'Dell: "Coming down the stretch in an action-packed first. Ladies hammering away. Nobody getting sloppy, mind. Good defense being played. But both fighters are committing on everything, really getting the power behind the punches. Ten seconds to go. Good exchange there and that's the bell. Close. Perry."
Cassie: "And, check out the staredown going on right now! No love lost between these two!"
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "Second begins as the first ended. Fighters right back at one another, letting the hands go, definitely showing plenty of bad intentions. GOOD right hand from Paltrow backed Perry up a step, but Katy right back in her grill, digging some body now, really testing those abs..."
Cassie: "And, as you pointed out, Jenny, there was a time when investing in the body was a chalk thing to do against Paltrow. Now, it takes a lot more investment."
O'Dell: "Perry down and back up. Paltrow ringing up Katy with another solid right, but Perry bangs right back. She's thumping hooks to the ribs, and using the straight stuff upstairs. Paltrow working more to the head, doing just enough downstairs to keep Katy honest. ANOTHER good right hand from Paltrow..."
Tess: "These shots remind me of the one she stopped Perry with the last time..."
O'Dell: "OH, A HUGE RIGHT HAND AND DOWN GOES PALTROW! Perry absolutely poleaxed Gwyneth with a BOOMING straight right and she ragdolls to her back!"
Cassie (singing): "Turn out the liiiiggghhhhttsss. The party's oooovvvveerrrrrr...."
O'Dell: "Perry to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Paltrow not moving at all..."
McCarthy: "He can count all day. Q-tip is OUT."
O'Dell: "Eight. Nine. TEN! And it's OVER! And your winner by KO2 in one-punch fashion is 'The Santa Barbara Slugger', Katy Perry!"
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Katy Perry, and, Katy, it was clear your plan was to take her out of there as quickly as you could..."
Katy: "Like I said, I had unfinished business. And, I came in here for the singular purpose of finishing it. I wasn't here to win a decision. I was here to knock her flat on her a**."
Tess: "What's next for you?"
Katy: "We'll just have to see what opportunities present themselves. Just like always, I'm up for anything."